


The Heart Wants What It Wants

by iseeyouwuv



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-01-10 22:39:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 35,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18417323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iseeyouwuv/pseuds/iseeyouwuv
Summary: No amount of pain and loss will stop two hearts who wants to be together, who are destined to be together, from being with one another.Clarke, a trauma surgeon with a dark past unbeknownst to her, was forced to go to Dr. Woods of the Psych department, a mysterious, green-eyed doctor, for the recurring nightmares she's been having that keeps her from sleeping. Join them as they forge a path that may help them find who they really are or may tear their very souls apart.PS: This is my first fanfic. Please be kind.





	1. The Beginning

**CHAPTER I**.

_“Clarke, baby, you have to wake up.” Abby Griffin shook her daughter’s shoulder gently to wake her up._

_“Five minutes Mom…” Clarke grumbled as she burrowed her head further towards her pillows._

_“Sweetie, you have to get up now. Clarke, please.” The 10-year-old girl slowly opened her eyes hearing her mother’s pleading voice. Now that she’s at least half awake, she could feel her father moving around her room, God knows doing what._

_“Mom? Dad? What’s going on?” Realizing that her father was packing up her suitcase (shoving things to her suitcase was probably more accurate), her questioning eyes shot up to meet her mother’s gaze as she sat up._

_“Princess, you have to change. Here.” her father’s, Jake’s, voice trembled as he handed her some of her clothes but didn’t explain further as he continued packing._

_“What? Change? Why do I have to change? What’s going on? Where are we going?” Standing up from bed, she immediately put on the clothes her father handed her, not caring about her parents being in the room. A bang from downstairs cut through the tense silence. Then several footsteps were heard going up the stairs. She looked at her parents, now standing beside each other. The fear on both of their eyes can’t be denied._

_“Clarke, you have to go. Use the window. Your Uncle Marcus would be out back waiting for you. You have to run now Clarke. Go!” She can hear the slamming of the doors as the footsteps neared her room. The doors opened and hooded figures came barging in. They started dragging her thrashing parents out of the room. “Clarke, we love you.” Her mother’s voice rang inside the room, suddenly overwhelming everything else. Somehow, she knew that was the last time she’d see her parents._

_“Mom! Dad! No! Please! Don’t!” Clarke screamed at the top of her lungs._

_“Clarke! Clarke! Stop, wake up!”_

Clarke Griffin jolted from the bed. Sweat covered her flushed skin. Her bed covers lay at the bottom of the bed, kicked off through her nightmare. _Can you even call it a nightmare if it happened in real life?_ Clarke thought. Her eyes settled on her best friend/roommate/’s, Raven’s, concerned face.

“Hey, sorry for waking you up. Just got excited there.” Clarke tried for a smile but she knew Raven would see right through it.

“You don’t have to put on a face for me Clarke. You know I understand. And don’t worry about me, I just got in. Here, drink this.” She handed Clarke a glass of water and sat beside her best friend, her back on the headboard.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s going on. It’s these goddamn flashbacks.”

“Is it still the same dream?”

“Yup. Nothing changes.”

“Maybe you should see someone about that Clarke. It’s been two weeks and it’s wearing you out. You look like your eyes have grown from the bags under them, not the other way around.” Clarke let out a small chuckle.

“In case you’ve forgotten Rae, I’m a doctor. I can handle this. Just a few pills and I’d go right back to sleep.”

“You’ve been doing that for the past two weeks Clarke and we both know it’s not helping. The purpose of sleeping is for you to get some rest. And you’re definitely not getting any.” 

“Okay, fine! I’ll go talk to Psych tomorrow before my shift.”

“Yes! Make sure you actually go Clarke or I swear to God, I’ll drag your ass up to Psych myself.”

“Sheesh, fine! What time is it anyway?” Clarke rolled her eyes. Raven checked her wristwatch which she hadn’t had the time to remove yet.

“It’s almost 30 minutes past 2. You should get some sleep. Don’t want you accidentally sleeping with a patient on your table now.” Raven started walking towards her best friend’s bedroom door. Clarke, once again, rolled her eyes.

“Har har, Reyes. Go to sleep, you need it.” Raven turned around in mock-offense. Clarke smiled sweetly and stuck her tongue out. She knows that she won’t be sleeping for the rest of the night but she’d be damned if she didn’t try.

 

* * *

 

**C**

Morning came, and God, Raven was right, the bags under her eyes looked so heavy. Seeing that she still had plenty of time before her shift at the hospital, she cooked breakfast for both her and Raven. Her roommate doesn’t really have the time to cook for herself when she wakes up for her work. She glanced at her wristwatch, checking if she still had enough time to go up to Psych. _I still have two hours, good._ She thought.

 _I hate my life. Why did I want to be a doctor again?_ Clarke never did want to be a doctor. After her mother died, she just thought that it would bring her closer to what had been. Abby Griffin was a dedicated doctor. Even though Clarke wanted to be an artist, she wanted to honor her memory by following her mother’s footsteps. She could still do art on her free time, she reasoned to herself. _Right, my 30-minute free time. Who was I kidding?_ She rolled her eyes at herself. She strode towards the elevator, immediately pressing the Psych department’s floor number. It’s not that she hated _being_ a doctor. She just hated the smell of hospitals. It’s really unnerving and it brings back memories, memories that she doesn’t want to remember. _Then why don’t you just open your own clinic? Yeah, like that’s going to happen. I was lucky getting a position in this town’s little hospital. I hate this town._

The elevator doors opened with a _ding_ and she immediately asked for a Dr. Woods. You’d think that Clarke would know every doctor this town’s _little_ hospital. The nurse pointed to a door towards her right. She nodded her thanks and trudged towards the room. She could hear voices talking inside. She raised her arm, ready to knock when the door opened. A brunette doctor with the greenest eyes she’s ever seen walked past her. Saying the brunette was gorgeous was an understatement. Wait, did her lab coat say Dr. Woods? Yup, definitely did.

“Dr. Woods?” Clarke said as she sidled up with the green-eyed doctor.

“Yes?” The brunette replied not taking her eyes off the chart she was looking at.

“Hi, I’m Clarke Griffin, Dr. Clarke Griffin. I asked earlier this morning if I could talk to you for a moment.” Slowly, she looked up at Clarke. And damn, her eyes are _really_ green. Dr. Woods cleared her throat. _Fuck, she caught me staring, didn’t she? Nice one Griffin._

“Ah, yes. Dr. Griffin. Please follow me this way.” Dr. Woods led her to another room where, she’s guessing, the brunette doctor’s office is. She opened the door for Clarke and let her in first which caused a wonderful blush on the blonde doctor’s face. “Dr. Griffin, I’m Dr. Lexa Woods. How may I help you?” She offered a hand towards Clarke which the blonde happily shook.

“Straight to the point I see. Very well. I’ve been having difficulty sleeping lately, specifically these past two weeks. I’m having these-these nightmares if you may. I eventually had to take mild sleeping pills just to have a good night’s sleep. But, let’s just say, good night’s sleep still hasn’t come.”

“Can you tell me about these nightmares?”

“Uhhh… Just really, _really_ bad dreams.” Clarke mentally face-palmed. _God, well that was helpful_. The brunette doctor’s face remained neutral. _She must be deciding whether she wanted to throw me into an asylum or kill me herself._

“Look, Dr. Griffin, I’m seeing you on my personal time here. Unless you tell me something we can start with, I can’t help you.”

“Can’t you just perform an evaluation just to know what we’re dealing with here? Or, or just prescribe something much stronger than what I am using? Really, just something to make me sleep, _really_ sleep.” She knew that _that_ was impossible.

“I do not _just prescribe something much stronger_ here Dr. Griffin. And for the evaluation, I need _something_ to evaluate. So if you don’t want to tell me anything of use here, I can’t do much.” Clarke knew coming here was a waste of time. Dr. Woods leaned on her swivel chair as she let Clarke ponder on her words.

“This was a mistake, I’m sorry. I have to go.” The blonde doctor immediately walked out Dr. Woods’ office then straight to the stairs, not even bothering to wait for an elevator. How could she be stupid? What if Dr. Woods tells on her? She’s pretty sure going in on 2 hours of sleep for the past two weeks is not procedure. And from what she could tell, Dr. Woods was a stickler for procedures.

Her pager beeped, someone just came in with a rake protruding on his chest. _Great, something to distract me. Well, not great- great, I mean… Whatever, you know what I mean. God, I’m talking to myself now. I really am going crazy._ She rolled her eyes for a good measure then proceeded to Trauma.

Clarke’s shift was a busy one. Somehow, the flow of patients cleared her head temporarily for her to take a nap on one of the on-call rooms. But that didn’t last long…

_“Abby, Clarke needs to know.” Jake told her wife in a hushed whisper. They thought that Clarke was taking an afternoon nap on her room but the little blonde girl had woken up thirsty. She was on her way to the kitchen when she heard her name. So she stopped behind the wall that separated the hallway to the living room from the kitchen._

_“Jake, she’s just a child. She doesn’t need to know yet.” Her mother replied._

_“We have to tell her now. We both know that it’ll be just a matter of time before they found us. Don’t we at least owe it to her to explain?”_

_“But Jake…” Her mother tried to interject but Jake’s words cut her off._

_“No Abby. We’ve been delaying this for the longest time. She’s our child! She needs to know that truth! You know how important she is Abby.”_

_“That’s just it! She’s our child! She’s important, not because of who she is, but because she is our child!”_

_“I’m sorry, but we’ll tell her tonight. We have to Abby, not just for our sakes but ultimately, for her.”_

_“But…”_

_“No buts, we tell her tonight Abby, and that’s final.” Clarke heard her father’s footsteps coming towards her so she took off running to her room, not really understanding what she just heard._

_Then the scene changes to that god-awful night…_

_“Mom! Dad! Please! No! Don’t! Don’t leave…”_

_“Dr. Griffin! Clarke! Hey, wake up!”_ Clarke felt someone shaking her. And she jolted awake. Her unfocused eyes darted everywhere on the dark on-call room. Then her eyes fixed on a pair of familiar green eyes. Lexa Woods was sitting on the bed beside her.

“You alright there?” Concerned, curious virescent eyes betrayed the stoic expression of Dr. Woods.

“Y-yeah. Fine.” Clarke stuttered as she tried to control her breathing as she fiddled with her scrub top.

“You sure? Here, drink some of this.” Dr. Woods offered her a bottled water. She quickly thanked the brunette and drank large gulps of water. The tense atmosphere in the room seemed to go on for hours before Dr. Woods spoke again. “So, you’ve been dealing with that for the past two weeks?” Clarke forced herself to not roll her eyes. _God, didn’t I tell her that?_ Suddenly the irritation she felt for the other doctor returned.

“Yes, that’s what I said earlier.” Even if she tried, she couldn’t keep that irritation from her voice. Whether the brunette did not pick up on it or decided to brush it off, she doesn’t know. Either way, the brunette’s expression remained stoic.

“Is the dream the same every night?” Dr. Woods prodded.

“Yes. It may differ on how it begins but it always ends the same way.” Clarke muttered.

“And you’re sure it only started two weeks ago?” Something in the way Dr. Woods asked her suggested that the brunette knew or at least had an idea of what was happening to her.

“Yes, what’s the significance?” Clarke asked, hopeful.

“Nothing. Just making sure.” She didn’t know if the brunette was lying or not, but it frustrated her to no end that she couldn’t read the green-eyed doctor.

“I’m not lying. Do you think I’d risk coming to you and being reported to the boss if I was lying?” Clarke defended.

“Okay. Well, that’s it then. I have to go.” Dr. Woods made a move to stand but Clarke’s hand on her wrist kept her from doing so.

“Wait, that’s it? Okay? You’re not telling on me?” Clarke’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“Why would I do that? It’s not a crime if you can’t go to sleep. It’s not like you’ve made a grave mistake resulting in a patient’s death. Wait, you didn’t right? Make a mistake that is.”

“Of course not!”

“Well then, that’s your answer. So, if you don’t need anything else, I really have to go now.” Clarke didn’t stop her this time, not even to say thank you.

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke endured a whole week before returning to Dr. Woods for help. A whole week of Raven urging her to return to the Psych doctor, with the same nightmares and sleepless nights. She finally relented when she fainted making breakfast for her and Raven. Thank God Raven had a wicked nose or their house would’ve been toasted, with them inside. She had taken the day off and phoned Dr. Woods’ office.

 

* * *

 

**L**

Lexa’s concentration was disturbed by a knock. She had been reviewing her notes on her latest patient behind her desk. She mumbled a quick ‘Come in’ then the door opened to a very exhausted-looking Dr. Clarke Griffin. The doctor wore a light blue, sleeveless loose shirt paired with white skinny jeans and three-inch, white, wedged sandals. Lexa though she was beautiful.

“Dr. Griffin. Please, come in. Take a seat.” Lexa stood up and gestured to a nearby sofa.

“Dr. Woods. Thank you for meeting me. And please, call me Clarke. I’m not a doctor today.” The blonde doctor managed a small smile before she sat down. Lexa sat on the opposite recliner with her clipboard.

“Okay, Clarke then. You can call me Lexa, whatever you prefer.”

“Lexa it is.”

“I supposed you are ready to tell me what’s bothering you then if you’re here.” Clarke rolled her eyes.

“That’s the plan.”

“Why don’t we start with simple questions? Let’s see where that goes, okay? I see that whatever it is that you dream about is very personal.” The blonde nodded, thankful for the brunette’s understanding. “How old are you Clarke?”

“Uh, I’m 27 years old, turning 28 in less than 7 months actually.” Lexa proceeded to write on the clipboard.

“How long have you lived here? Are you here with your family? Mother? Father? Siblings?” The brunette noticed the dark look that took over Clarke’s face at the mention of her family.

“I’ve lived here all my life. I’m an only child, and my parents passed away when I was ten, so no family.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Emotions broke Lexa’s stoic expression; her eyes softened as does the thin line on her lips curved downward. In understanding or pity, Clarke didn’t know.

“I don’t need your sorry. Can we please just move on?” Clarke snapped at Lexa. Years of people looking at her with pity and something like curiosity, of how she survived, made the blonde irritable. Clarke immediately regretted the action when Lexa’s face went back to neutral. The brunette doctor was gorgeous when she lets herself feel.

“Is there any history of sleeping disorders in your family that you know of?” Lexa continued.

“None, I think. I’ve never known any relatives, so all I have is my parents’ medical records. They didn’t have any.”

“Have you ever experienced this before? Even just in passing?” The green-eyed doctor studied the blonde. The bags under her eyes seemed to have doubled. Her ocean blue eyes looked much more haunted. She appeared thinner than she had last seen her on the on-call room. But despite those changes, she still looked beautiful as ever. _Really Lexa? Is this really the right time? You have a job here. Stick with it._ Lexa shook her out of those thoughts. Then she realized, Clarke has been talking. _She’s answering your question. Duh._ Lexa cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, can you repeat that again? I didn’t get all of it.”

“I said yes, on the first few years after…” That dark look fell on Clarke’s face again. _So the nightmares are about her parents._ The brunette just waited for the blonde to continue, “…after my parents died.”

“Have you tried to talk about this with anyone other than me?”

“Yes. Most of my friends know, they lived all their lives in this little town too. So, even if it’s really not my choice, they know.”

“What do you mean by ‘even if it’s really not your choice’? Don’t you want them to know?”

“I guess. At least I wouldn’t get the looks every time my parents are mentioned.”

“Did you tell them everything you know?” The blonde’s brows furrowed in confusion. Lexa immediately rephrased the question, catching up to her slip-up. “I mean; did you tell them everything; how you felt about all of it? How their looks affect you? How that event affected you?”

“Yes. I went ballistic one time because they kept coddling me. Most of them know by now not to look at me like I’m that same little girl who cried her eyes out after her parents died. I’m a grown woman now, I can handle it; I’ve _been_ handling it for the past 17 years.”

“And how have you been handling it Clarke?” Lexa’s gaze was unwavering against Clarke’s.

“I’m sorry, what?” The blonde doctor was taken aback by the question. She realized she can’t answer, because she had none.

“I asked how you’ve been handling it.” An uncomfortable silence seemed to take over the whole room. Lexa looked at the blonde. Frustration was evident on her face as she thought for an answer. Sensing that Clarke had no answer for her question, she decided to push that aside for the time being. “Never mind that Clarke. Let’s move on, how did you become a doctor?” The blonde’s face lit up.

“My mother was a trauma surgeon. Her name was Abby. I thought that if I became one, I’d be honoring her memory. In a way, I thought maybe I’d still be connected to her somehow.”

“How did you feel after becoming a doctor?”

“Honestly?” Lexa nodded. “At first, I was relieved really. I never thought I’d finish it. You know how med school was.” Lexa cracked a small smile at that. “I remembered wondering; if my parents could see me now, would they be proud? But I never dwelt on that thought. The next thing I knew; I was already working. And all my head could say was, I hate this job. Don’t get me wrong, the feeling of saving people’s lives is satisfying and heart-warming. But that’s all this is, a job. I want to be doing something I love, something I’m passionate about and sadly, this is not it.” Clarke wasn’t one to trust people that openly. But with Lexa, she felt like she could tell her whole life story and she’d never regret in doing so.

The brunette was about to ask another question when a knock came through the door. She looked at the clock on the wall, it’s been an hour. A voice came through next saying that her next patient had arrived.

“I’m sorry Clarke, but I’d have to leave this at that for now.” She apologized as they both stood up.

“Uh, no don’t worry. It’s okay. And thank you for meeting me. This has been… _interesting_.” Clarke said, waving it off though her voice tinged with disappointment.

“What time is your shift tomorrow? Maybe I could squeeze you in on my hours.”

“Uhmmm, I’m not really sure. How about I just text it to you later?”

“Sure, here’s my personal number.” Lexa wrote her number on her a paper on her clipboard, tore it off and handed it to Clarke. The blonde doctor smiled as she took the paper.

“Thank you Dr. Woods, I mean Lexa. And I’m sorry, for snapping at you earlier. I haven’t said sorry for that.”

“It’s alright. I understand. I’ll see you soon then. As for your sleep tonight, just drink a lot of water before you go to bed. Hopefully, it’ll help.” Clarke couldn’t keep herself from rolling her eyes at that.

“No shit, Sherlock. God, I did not know that. And I’m not a doctor.” Lexa just smirked. Her green eyes shining with amusement. Lexa returned to her previous position behind the desk. Clarke, already holding the doorknob, turned to her and waved a goodbye. The blonde doctor left with a smile on her lips.


	2. A Glimpse of the Past

**CHAPTER II.**

“Hey Clarke, we still on for tonight?” Raven asked as she sat on the opposite of Clarke’s chair.

“Yup, tell O and the others I’ll be late though. I am to meet Lexa after my shift, it’s her only free time.” The blonde replied.

“So, she’s Lexa now? I remember you saying she’s this goody-two shoes, pain in the ass who worships the rules. What changed?” Clarke could hear Raven’s smirk without looking up from her breakfast.

“She’s still the same Lexa, stickler for rules and a pain in the ass but that’s not all she is.”

“Oh, yes, _no_ , she isn’t all that.” Clarke glared at her best friend.

“Spit it out Rae. I know you’ve got something to say.” Raven clapped enthusiastically as she dragged her chair closer to Clarke’s.

“You like her.” It was a simple statement yet Clarke couldn’t find something to say. Raven started laughing on Clarke’s wide-eyed face.

“What are you talking about Reyes? That’s absurd!” The blonde defended weakly. She’s been seeing Lexa, professionally of course, for the past two, three and a half months. Just talking about things, though she had yet to tell her about how her parents died. All she said was there was a fire, although she can’t exactly tell her anything else because she doesn’t really remember anything else. And in those 14 weeks, Clarke might’ve developed a crush towards the brunette. Raven was having the time of her life laughing.

“Oh my God! Clarke, you do like her! Hahaha. You should’ve seen your face Princess. It was puh-riceless.”

“I didn’t say that!”

“Well you didn’t deny it either, did you?”

“Raven, stop it. I do not like her.”

“Princess, could you try that again? Say it like you mean it.” Raven busted out laughing once again.

“Whatever Reyes. I’m going to take a shower and go to work. I’ll leave you to your absurdity.” She stood up, put her plate on the sink and stomped towards the bathroom, leaving a smirking Raven behind.

 

* * *

 

**C**

Clarke’s phone beeped for the nth time that night, and Lexa was beginning to get annoyed. She was doing Clarke a favor for staying another hour after her shift ended. The least she could do was turn the damned phone off.

[Octavia: Yow, Clarke. Where are you? The whole gang’s here.]

“Dr. Griffin, do you have somewhere to be?” Irritation was dripping from the brunette’s voice. Clarke blushed, catching on to the brunette’s annoyance. The brunette took to calling Clarke with formality when she’s annoyed or frustrated.

“I’m so sorry Lexa. But I have to cut this one short. My friends and I have this dinner thing and apparently they’re all there.”

“You could have just told me that Dr. Griffin instead of pushing to meet tonight. That way we could have used our time for more important matters.” Lexa’s stoic expression never wavered but her eyes let the blonde know just how bothered the brunette was. _I wouldn’t need anything else to read this woman, her eyes say it all. Wait, did she just say I’m not important?_

“Did you just say I’m a waste of time?” Clarke scoffed, her hackles rising.

“I did not say that Clarke.”

“But it was implied.” The blonde glared at the brunette. She shouldered her bag and stood up from the couch. “You know Dr. Woods, you could have just told me no if you had ‘more important matters’. I’m not the only who agreed to this.” She walked out of the brunette’s office.

 

* * *

 

 

“Look at Clarke, she’s sulking. That’s the definition of sulking.” Clarke snapped out of her thoughts when she heard her name from Raven.

“What?” She took a sip from her beer. Dinner was a blur. She couldn’t get her mind off the infuriating brunette. Next thing she knows, they’re on their way to the only bar in town. Now, they’re all sitting at the table talking about Bellamy’s camp which she admittedly tuned out.

“Sulking and apparently, spacing out.” Raven finished.

“Whatever. What were you talking about Bellamy? Please continue.” She tipped her glass towards Bellamy Blake. Bellamy and Octavia Blake, also dubbed as the Blake siblings, were like her brother and sister. They took her in when her parents died. Bell was a couple of years older than her while Octavia was a year younger.

“Yeah, as I was saying, this boot camp was hell. You had to wake up at o-fucking-early even when they keep you up until the ass crack of dawn. Seriously guys, I don’t know what my Dad was thinking sending me there.”

“You keep saying that it was hell, but you still went for another two weeks than your supposed stay.” Octavia answered.

“I didn’t say that I didn’t enjoy going there, I just said it was hell.” Came Bellamy’s snarky reply.

“Cut it out you two. So Clarke, I heard you have a new girlfriend.”  Clarke’s eyes met Raven’s gaze.

“I’m going to kill you Raven.”

“So the Princess does have a girlfriend.” Octavia piped up.

“No, I don’t. She’s a self-serving bitch.”

“Lover’s quarrel?” Bellamy butted in. She knows it’s all good-natured teasing but Clarke was starting to lose her patience. She’s not normally this ill-tempered but the altercation with Lexa has been gnawing at her. She haven’t got the time to let it out yet.

“Something went down with you and the good doctor then. You were all ‘that’s not all she is’ this morning. What happened?” Raven’s smirk still present as she continued teasing.

“Oooh, the girlfriend is a doctor? Do we know her?” Octavia’s interest picked up.

“I heard she’s new. Just been here for a year I think.” Raven answered.

“Stop talking about her! God, I’m not in the mood for this. Can you just move on?” Clarke snapped at all of them. All eyes went to her.

“Princess, are you okay? Seriously, you’ve been spacing out a lot tonight. Did something happen at the hospital?” The smirk dropped from Raven’s face replaced by concern.

“Yeah. Sorry. My shift just got a little shitty today. So, I’m going to head home first, if that’s okay?” She said as nonchalant as she could.

“Of course, Princess. You look like you haven’t slept in a while. You should go rest.” Bellamy agreed and the rest of the group nodded.

“You sure you’re okay driving Clarke? I could drive us home then just come back for your car tomorrow morning.” Raven asked. Clarke may not admit it but talking to Lexa somewhat helped her. The nightmares still come and go but she’s had at least 4 nights of good night’s sleep for the past two weeks.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure.” She smiled at her friends, always trying to make her feel better. “I’m really sorry guys, for snapping at you and for not staying. It’s really good to see all of you. Maybe we could schedule another dinner this coming week?”

“Yeah, we’ll just text you or Raven when and where. You take care of yourself okay? Your patients aren’t the only one who needs taking care of.” Octavia mumbled on her hair as she stood up and hugged her. The others followed suit.

“Yes. Thank you guys. Love you all. Rae, I’ll see you at the house okay?” Raven nodded and waved goodbye. She waved back and she was out the door seconds later. She was on her way to her car when a moving shadow caught her eyes. She looked around and spotted a person leaning against the alley beside the bar who suspiciously looked like he/she was watching her. A car alarm sounded beside her, she was forced to take her eyes off the stranger. She had walked too close triggering the alarm. When she brought her gaze back up to the alley again, the stranger was nowhere to be found.

 

* * *

 

_“Clarke, you have to go. Use the window. Your Uncle Marcus will be out back waiting for you. You have to run now Clarke. Go!” She heard her mother say. Instead of staying this time, she started running towards her window with tears running down her face. A rope ladder was on the side, folded into two. She immediately unfolded the ladder and started going down. She heard shots being fired just as she finished climbing down the last rung._

_She was tempted to look up, just to see if someone was looking out for her. But she discarded that thought as she ran towards the back where her mother said her Uncle Marcus was. True to her mother’s words, Marcus Kane, her parents’ best friend, was there, just behind the tree line._

_“Uncle Marcus. We have to help them, please. My mom and my dad, they’re still there.” Little Clarke cried as her Uncle Marcus hugged her close._

_“I’m so sorry Princess, we can’t. We have to leave now. They’ll be looking for you.” Marcus started pulling her up but she managed to slip out of his grasp._

_“No! I’m not going anywhere without my parents!” Just as she finished speaking, glass shattering was heard from the house. Clarke turned her head and saw that her room was on fire. She could see silhouettes through the smoke, a woman, her mother was still alive, fighting off someone. “Mom!” She screamed. Marcus immediately put a hand on her mouth to keep her from attracting someone’s attention._

_“Sssh, little one, be quiet.” Then the house’s front door slammed open. Shots rang all over the house. She kept thrashing on Marcus’ arms, successfully slipping out of his hold once again. She started running towards the house but Marcus was quick to pull her to the tree line’s shadows. “Okay, okay, I’ll go check. Just please. Stay here, okay? Don’t make a sound. Make sure no one sees you? Okay?” Clarke nodded._

_Marcus Kane slowly inched towards the back door and inside the house. Clarke watched from the shadows as her house was swallowed by the fire. The back door opened once more. She was expecting her Uncle Marcus out the door, but it wasn’t him. She can’t tell who it was but she knew the person wasn’t alone. The person was dragging someone out the door by their throat. The person seemed to lean over the other, like his whispering something on the other’s ear. Then all of a sudden, a scream was heard. The one being held by the throat started flailing their arms and legs, but the other just kept leaning over._

_Suddenly the screaming stopped, then the flailing. The other person dropped from the other one’s grasp. She squinted her eyes as she tried to get a better look. Her breath caught in her throat. She could’ve sworn he was looking right at her. But that’s not the part that scared her the most. The place where his irises were supposed to be, were shining gold. It could’ve been just the fire and smoke’s doing, she didn’t know. The person seemed to step in her direction but she couldn’t be sure because one moment he was there, and in a blink of an eye, the person was gone. Then someone was picking her up from behind._

_“No! Please! What are you doing?! Let me go! Please! Let me go!”_

Clarke woke up drenched in sweat. Her eyes bounced all over her room. That was the first time her dreams changed. She glanced at the clock, she’d been asleep for over two hours now. She didn’t know if Raven was back home, but she had to speak to someone about her dream. So she decided to text the only other person who knew about her sleeping difficulties, Lexa.

[Clarke (Saturday - 3:23am): Hi, Lexa. I know we didn’t exactly end on a good note last night, but you said to tell you if something changed.]

[Clarke (Saturday – 3:27am): I’m sorry, I know the time is inconvenient. You’re probably still asleep. Anyway, could I maybe talk to you later today? Something changed. And I don’t know what to make of it.]

[Clarke (Saturday – 4:01am): It’s me again, please send me a message if you get any of my messages.]

Clarke laid awake in her bed for the rest of the night. Her shift wasn’t till 11am and sleep won’t come to her anymore. Her mind kept going back to that horrible night when her parents died, murdered. She remembered everything about that day clearly. From the moment she woke up to the moment her parents made her climb out the window. Then everything after that was a blur. The next thing she remembered was Mr. Blake, Bell and O’s father, the town sheriff at the time, carrying her towards an ambulance. Their house was on the outskirts of the town; it was a 45-minute drive. So, 45 minutes of her memory that night was lost. Ever since she woke up from the hospital, she’d been trying her best to remember those lost minutes just to help the police out. But the memories just won’t come to her.

She huffed in frustration. _What the hell is going on?_ Just then, her phone beeped.

[Lexa Woods (Saturday – 6:33am): Good morning Dr. Griffin. Today is my day-off so I won’t be at the hospital. But if you’re free, we could meet outside for coffee and talk about your dream.]

Clarke rolled her eyes at Dr. Griffin. _Can’t the girl just call me Clarke like normal people?_ And did she just ask me out? _Yup, she asked you out to talk about your dream, out of a professional capacity. Stop getting your hopes up._ But she mentioned coffee. _Of course she mentioned coffee, you did wake her up before sunrise on her day-off._ Another beep brought her out of her thoughts.

[Lexa Woods (Saturday – 6:45am): Clarke? Are you on your shift?]

Clarke gathered her thoughts and immediately replied.

[Clarke (Saturday – 6:47am): Lexa, hi, good morning to you too. I’m sorry for waking you up so early on your day off. Thank you for replying. My shift’s not till 11 so I guess I could do coffee. Where do you want to meet and what time?]

[Lexa Woods (Saturday – 6:53am): Don’t worry about it, I usually wake up at 6 for my run, just overslept. How about the Grounder’s? Let’s say 8:30?]

Lexa Woods, on a tank top and running shorts, all sweaty and breathing hard invaded Clarke’s mind. And boy, what a sight would that be? Clarke shook her head out of the gutter and replied.

[Clarke (Saturday – 6:57am): Grounder’s at 8:30 sounds good. I’ll meet you there. And thank you again, for replying. I thought you’d still be pissed off after last night.]

[Lexa Woods (Saturday – 7:03am): Nonsense, Clarke. You’re my patient. I can’t be ‘pissed off’.]

Clarke couldn’t reign in the disappointment from spreading throughout her chest even if she wanted to. _See, you’re her patient._ She kicked off the bed covers and proceeded to start her day. She’s got a psychiatrist to meet.

 

* * *

 

The blonde doctor can’t really deny her excitement, seeing that she arrived at Grounder’s 15 minutes before the meet-up. She’d been feeling nervous and antsy ever since she last texted Lexa. She blamed it on her dreams though, not ready to admit that the brunette makes her feel _things_.

At exactly 8:30, the door opened to Lexa Woods in all her tank-top-and-running-shorts glory. Clarke gulped. _My imagination doesn’t do her any justice._ The brunette started walking towards her and Clarke’s eyes landed on Lexa’s legs. _Oh my. Those are very finely sculpted legs._ A clearing of throat drew her out of her thoughts. The psychiatrist stood before her with a smirk on her face. _Busted._

“Clarke.” The brunette greeted with a nod as she sat down on the other side of the booth. She removed her ponytail and let her hair down on a wave.

“Hi.” Clarke greeted with a smile. “Thank you for coming. I know you must have things to do on your day off.” The brunette just nodded. “So, the dream…” Lexa cut her off with a look.

“Clarke, it’s too early for that. Why don’t we order something first? You still have plenty time.” Clarke just stared at her.

“A-are you sure?” The blonde stammered.

“Yes, I’m sure. Would I suggest it if I thought otherwise?” The brunette’s eyes sparkled in amusement and the patented Lexa smirk was back and Clarke just wanted to wipe it off her face. _Who are you kidding? You’d rather have that than the poker face she seemed to have mastered._

“Okay.”

“Good, I need my caffeine hit.” Lexa stood up just as she did. “Don’t worry about it Clarke, my treat.” Lexa smiled at her, genuinely smiled at her and she thought momentarily if she could go blind with how bright Lexa’s smile was. “Clarke?” Lexa was still smiling at her, but this one’s full of mischief.

“Yeah, uhmmm, no, the least I could do is pay for your coffee. I’m the one who intruded on your personal day.” She started scouring her bag for her purse but Lexa put a hand on her arm. She looked up and, _God_ , those green eyes would be the death of her. Those soft, green eyes stared back at her.

“No, it’s alright.” Lexa smiled. “It’s my peace offering, for last night. I did agree on the meeting and it wasn’t fair of me to be angry and blame it all on you.”

“I thought you can’t be pissed off with a patient?” Clarke teased, though there’s an underlying hope somewhere in there.

“Well you’re not a patient Clarke, you’re my co-worker.” Clarke’s face fell, if only for a fraction. At this, Lexa squeezed Clarke’s arm that she hadn’t let go of yet, a smile graced her lips. “And you’re also a friend.” The blonde’s face lit up. Her ocean blue eyes shone with glee.

“And as your friend, I require an apology.” Clarke lifted her chin up in defiance. Lexa cocked an eyebrow.

“Don’t push it Griffin.” The blonde doctor just laughed. “Now, tell me what your order is, we’ve just wasted 5 minutes standing here.” Lexa squeezed Clarke’s arm one last time before releasing it. The blonde finally relented. She gave Lexa her order and returned to her seat. She watched Lexa walk up to the line, her calves flexed every step she made. Her eyes travelled to that shapely ass and towards the brunette’s muscled back. And then, _and then_ Lexa turned around and caught Clarke’s gaze, again. The psychiatrist raised an eyebrow as she watched the blush spread throughout the blonde’s face. Then that smirk once again took over the brunette’s face. The blonde just glared back. She could see a smile playing on Lexa’s face. A few moments later, the psychiatrist was back at her seat just waiting for their names to be called. The blonde decided that it’s her turn to ask Lexa questions, at least for the time being.

“So, Lexa Woods, how old are you?”

“I thought we were here to talk about you?” The brunette tried to deflect.

“We are, but then you said that it’s too early for that kind of talk. I figured it’s your turn to answer the questions. So, again, Lexa Woods, how old are you?” The brunette’s brows furrowed. Clarke took the reaction as Lexa not wanting to divulge the information. “You don’t have to answer, don’t worry about it.” The blonde mumbled before looking around the room, avoiding Lexa’s eyes.

“No, I’m sorry, something just ran through my mind. I’m 29 years old.” The brunette immediately answered back, realizing that Clark took her silence the wrong way.

“Oh, not that far apart I see. How long have you lived here?” _Yeah right, like you didn’t know. You practically investigated everything Lexa Woods._ The brunette chuckled, probably knowing that Clarke _knew_ the answer to the question. _You did access her file at the hospital system. The same system she has access to. She could’ve seen who checked out her file._

“I’ve been living here for the past year and…” Lexa seemed to have been counting so Clarke waited for her to continue, “…112 days.”

“Very specific. Why did you move to this sleepy old town? Did you move here with anyone?”

“No, I moved here on my own. And as for why, I missed sleepy old towns.” Lexa smiled wistfully. “I’ve been living in loud cities for far too long, so I moved here.” Clarke was just about to ask her next question when their names were called. She insisted on getting it since Lexa already paid for it.

“So Clarke,” Clarke looked at her after taking a sip of her coffee, “tell me about your nightmare.” _Back to business as usual, I see._

“Yes, my nightmare. I already told you about my parents dying because of a house fire. Well, I was there when it happened.” If Lexa was shocked or surprised about the revelation, she didn’t let it show. The brunette just nodded. “All of my nightmares, last night’s included, were all about that house fire. Half of it were the last moments I could remember from that night.” Memories of last night’s nightmare flashed through Clarke’s mind. She shivered.

“Hey, are you okay? Are you sure you want to talk about it here?”

“Yes, just not in detail, at least not yet anyway. I’d like to gather my thoughts before I tell you.” Lexa just nodded encouragingly. “So, yes, the house fire. Most of that night was a blur for me. It’s like the memory of the most important parts of that night was just…deleted, erased.”

“It is possible that your mind just repressed your memories from that traumatic event? So you didn’t have to process everything that’s happened and to keep yourself from hurting further?”

“Yes, I’ve heard about that. Is it like a defense mechanism?”

“It could be.”

“Then why is it coming up now? I just don’t understand.”

“There are many situations that could trigger it. I’m sorry for asking this, but is your parents’ death anniversary coming up?” Clarke stiffened at the question. She just shook her head. “Any of their birthdays coming up?” The blonde shook her head again. “Anything relating to them? Anything at all?”

“No, well, except _my_ birthday. It is somewhat related to them since I’m there daughter.” Lexa thought about it for a moment.

“Have you been to your parents’ grave lately? Have you interacted with people or things relating to your parents or that night?” The more Lexa asked her questions, the darker the look on Clarke’s face. She wasn’t ready about this line of questioning. The blonde was close to tears as she tried to remember something, anything that could be useful. She’s tired of going back and forth. She was startled by a hand squeezing her own. She glanced at Lexa’s hand covering her own. “Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. It’s okay if you didn’t want to answer the questions.” The blonde squeezed back as she thankfully nodded. She didn’t want to break down in a room full of strangers.

“I’m sorry. I thought I could go through with this.”

“It’s okay. You can’t force what you’re not ready for.”

“Thank you.” The blonde instantly missed the warmth that the brunette’s palm provided when Lexa removed her hand.

“You’re welcome. So, how much time do we have left?” Clarke glanced at her wristwatch.

“An hour or so.”

“Good, so, you said on our previous sessions that you’re first dream was to be an artist.” Clarke nodded. “What set off your fondness for art?” Clarke smiled.

“I told you we lived pretty far into the woods. There’s not many houses out there. Our closest neighbor was a 15-minute drive. With no one to play with, I had to entertain myself. Growing up, I wasn’t one for watching TV. I preferred reading. Sometimes I’d try reading one of the ‘grown-up books’, I dubbed my parents’ books as such, and I would eventually get bored because I couldn’t understand all the words.” Lexa let out a small laugh at that, imagining a chubby, blue-eyed Clarke frowning in confusion on all the big words. “Hey, no laughing! Anyway, one day, my dad saw that I was bored as hell so he took me to town and bought me art supplies. He taught me how to draw, how to paint, everything he could think of. He would tell me, ‘If you ever get bored or lonely, just look around you. You’ve got the whole universe as your playground. There’re many things you could learn and do with your beautiful mind. All you need is a blank piece of paper and a pen, and the rest is up to you.’”

“That was beautiful Clarke.” The back of Lexa’s hand gently swiped against her cheek, Clarke noticed just then that she had been crying. “Your father must have been amazing.”

“He was.” Clarke mused. “God, I’m sorry. I’m such a mess.” Lexa just shook her head.

“You have nothing to apologize for Clarke. You can tell me anything and I promise you, I’d never judge.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” The silence that came after wasn’t like the other times before, it was comfortable and welcome for once. They just sat there smiling while they drank their coffee. They didn’t need words to convey what they want to say. And then Clarke’s phone beeped. The blonde just smiled sheepishly while the brunette just rolled her eyes. How hard is it to turn the damned thing off?

[Raven (Saturday – 9:43am): Hey Princess, where are you? I thought you said your shift starts at 11. Btw, O just called me, she said she didn’t want to bother you in case you were on your shift. The gang’s meeting at the bar later, are you free to come?]

“I’m sorry about this but I have to text back or my best friend will arrange a search party for me.” Lexa just nodded.

[Clarke (Saturday – 9:47am): Morning Rae, I’m at the Grounder’s. Had to meet with Lexa. Last night’s dream took a different turn. And my shift ends at 3 am, I doubt I’ll be able to come. But if you’re still out that late, I might be able to catch you.]

[Raven (Saturday – 9:48am): O said they don’t get off work till 1, same as me and the others so I’ll just text them you’ll just catch up.]

[Raven (Saturday – 9:48am): Coffee with your girlfriend I see. ;)]

[Raven (Saturday – 9:49am): Sorry about the nightmare Princess. Tell me about it later. Right now, I want to know what Dr. Green Eyes said.]

Clarke’s face turned to red in seconds. She chanced a glance at Lexa who was looking right back at her. Curiosity and amusement danced in her eyes. She turned back to her phone and quickly typed her reply.

[Clarke (Saturday – 9:50am): I’m going to kill you later Reyes. Finished talking to you. Bye.]

Clarke cleared her throat as she stuffed her phone back in her bag. She reached for her coffee and drank all of it in one go.

“You okay there Clarke? You look like you’re about to explode.” Lexa smirked.

“Whatever.” Clarke stuck her tongue out.

“Real mature Clarke.” Lexa laughed.

“It’s my turn to ask.”

“How so?”

“It just is. Stop asking Woods.” Lexa just shrugged. “Why Psychiatry?” The brunette thought for a moment.

“I like figuring people out,” was Lexa’s simple answer.

“So basically, you just want to one-up everyone?” Clarke teased. The brunette just glared at her.

“No. I just want to know what makes people tick. I just want to know who I’m really talking to, not just what they show me. I don’t like being…unaware, ignorant so to speak.”

“Good one. But, don’t you sometimes miss the mystery of it all? If it could be that easy for you to read someone, then where’s the thrill in that? And how does that even work? One look and you’ll know that you don’t like someone? How do you even fall in love with someone if you can figure them out that easily?”

“Whoa. Hey. It’s not as easy as that. I haven’t figured you out yet, have I?” Clarke was stunned for a minute. _Did she just imply that…? Nah. That was her logic. And this is you hoping that it meant what you thought she meant._ Clarke cleared her throat and took a large gulp of her coffee. The she changes her line of questioning, “So how about your family? You said you moved here on your own.”

“Dead.” The brunette’s expression hardened. Her eyes took this far away expression; cold, hard and distant.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.” Clarke apologized.

“No, don’t worry about it. Anything else?” Lexa’s gaze softened as it landed on Clarke’s face.

“Uh, you’ve been here a year. Have you met anyone? Anyone special? Boyfriend?” Clarke knew that the question was sudden. But she couldn’t _not_ know. Lexa just smiled.

“No, no boyfriend. But that would be because I don’t date men. And no girlfriend either, I’ve just been focusing on my work so I haven’t got the time to go searching. How about you?”

“Uh, no boyfriend, thank God I broke up with the last one, and no girlfriend. Just plain, old Clarke.”

“Why the violent reaction with the ex? And you’re not plain Clarke. You’re quite interesting, and that’s coming from me.” Lexa’s smirk was back.

“Oh yeah, the high and mighty Lexa,” was Clarke’s reply in mock-irritation.

“I’m not high and mighty. I’m just honest.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

Clarke looked at her wristwatch for the second time. She had to go.

“You need to go.” It wasn’t a question. Lexa knew that the blonde had to go. She understood.

“Yes, unfortunately I have to.”

“No worries. How about we talk about this again tomorrow? What time does your shift start?”

“Tomorrow’s my day-off so I could go anytime.” Lexa rifled through her mind’s organizer, checking which time was the most appropriate.

“How about 2 pm? I get off at 4 so we’ve got plenty of time to talk.”

“You memorized your whole schedule?” Clarke asked in disbelief.

“Not my intention. It just gets stuck. So how about it?”

“2 pm it is.”

“Okay. That’s settled then.” They both stood up from their seats. Neither knew what to do next. Is it too familiar to go for a hug or too formal to go for a handshake?

“Uh. This is awkward.” Clarke mumbled. Lexa’s smirk grew. The brunette stepped to Clarke’s side and initiated a hug. To say that Clarke was surprised was an understatement but she returned the hug just as tight. Both were smiling when they pulled away. Lexa was the first to walk away, leaving a blushing Clarke to watch. The psychiatrist glanced back just as she opened the door and sent a wave to Clarke.  Then she was out the door. _Well that was unexpected._


	3. A Part of the Truth

**CHAPTER III.**

**C**

“Hey Clarke! Glad you could make it!” Octavia greeted the moment Clarke walked through the bar’s door. The younger Blake handed Clarke her beer.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Hey Princess!” Bellamy bellowed from behind Clarke.

“Hey doofus. Where you been?”

“Restroom. So, no shitty shifts today?” Bellamy asked as he put his arm around Clarke. The blonde leaned towards the warmth.

“Nah, everything’s fine.” Clarke replied sipping her beer.

“I heard that you’ve been having trouble sleeping lately.”

“Let me guess, a little snitch named Raven told you.” Clarke glared at the back of Raven’s head. Sensing the daggers being glared at her, the said roommate turned from playing darts with Octavia. _What?_ She mouthed to Clarke.

“Don’t be angry with her, we all saw the bags under your eyes.”

“I’ve been having nightmares. That’s all.”

“And that’s why you’ve been seeing a psychiatrist?”

“Really Raven? You even told them about Dr. Woods?” She threw a peanut towards Raven.

“What? They asked!” Raven defended.

“Whatever.” She rolled her eyes and turned to Bellamy. “Yes, that’s why.”

“You should’ve told us. You know both you and Raven are welcome to stay at the house. A matter of fact, Dad’s been hounding us to get you to visit.”

“I have work Bell. You know that.” She looked around the bar, her eyes settling on a familiar pair of eyes looking back at her from the corner table. _Is that Lexa? The good doctor has a life._ She was with another woman. The brunette’s face was stoic, her eyes hard. Clarke frowned in confusion.

“You okay Princess?” Bell whispered to her hair. Their eye contact broke.

“Huh, yeah. What’d you say?” Clarke said shaking her head, taking another sip at her beer.

“I said it’s a 30-minute drive.”

“Bell, you know I rarely have any time free. But I’ll try to drop by soon okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever Princess.” Clarke chanced a glance at the corner table. Lexa wore her usual long-sleeved shirt, but instead of black, it was dark green and a pair of black skinny jeans. The brunette was now talking with the other woman, rather intensely if you asked Clarke. She didn’t know if the two were about to start punching each other on that face or start ripping each other’s clothes off. That thought didn’t settle well for Clarke. _Are you seriously jealous?_ She shook her head once again.

“Hey Clarke, how’s the meet with Dr. Green Eyes?” At the mention of Lexa, Clarke once again glanced her way.

“Uh, fine. We talked.”

“That’s it?” Raven pushed. She and Octavia took a seat in front of Bell and Clarke.

“Yup. That’s it.” She put her arms around Bell’s waist, taking in the warmth that his body was providing. That was common occurrence for all of them, Bell and Clarke acting all cuddly. So nobody really says anything.

“Well, that was boring.” Octavia drawled. Then suddenly the bar’s door slammed close. Clarke saw a glimpse of brunette hair before the door fully closed, Lexa. She glanced at the other woman, who was now glaring right at the blonde. Her confusion furthered. _What the hell?_

* * *

 

[Bellamy Blake (Sunday – 11:07am): Hey Princess, want to grab lunch?]

Clarke groaned. She just literally fell asleep. Her nightmare kept her up all night. The sleeping pills she took didn’t do the trick.

“Why do you hate me?!” She screamed at no one.

[Clarke (Sunday – 11:10am): Sorry Bell, I was planning on catching up to some sleep. Rain check?]

[Bellamy Blake (Sunday – 11:11am): Sure. Take care of yourself babe.]

[Clarke (Sunday – 11:12am): Thanks. Ttyl.]

The blonde tried to get to sleep but that was fruitless. So she took out one of her sketch pads and a pencil. She carefully drew the outline of a familiar face. Then the wavy locks she imagined would feel like silk if she were to run her hands through it. She took her time shading those expressive eyes just to get a fraction of how beautiful they looked when they sparkled. Then brows that would raise in challenge and mischief. Then the nose that would flare whenever frustration gets to her. And last but not the least, a pair of plump, kissable lips which are often pursed on a straight line. Clarke couldn’t count how many times she’d imagined that pair of lips on hers and how soft they would feel. She erased a couple of unintended smudges here and there; the sketch was done.

Clarke’s eyes widened. There on her previously blank paper, was none other than Lexa Woods’ face staring back at her. _Oh God, I’m screwed._ She thought. She was falling for the brunette and she can’t do anything to stop it, even if she wanted to.

_She doesn’t want to._

 

* * *

 

 

**L**

“Anya, we already talked about this.” Lexa muttered irritatingly.

“Is that what we did? If I remember it correctly, you talked. Told me to leave because you’ve got it all under control. And then next thing I knew, you were out slamming the door. Is that your definition of talk?” Anya asked as she paced in front of Lexa’s desk.

“You already said your piece. I already said mine. What more do we need to say?” The psychiatrist pinched the bridge of her nose to keep herself from lashing out.

“You said you could handle this. You said you _would_ handle this. I don’t see any handling happening.” Anya shot back. Lexa’s expression hardened. Her jaw clenched in anger. The brunette stood up and glared at the newly-hired nurse.

“Are you doubting _my_ capability of doing _my_ job, Anya?” She gritted through her teeth. Anya shrunk to herself. She visibly gulped.

“No, no. I’m not. I’m sorry.” She apologized.

“You better be.” Lexa’s hard expression remained as she sat back down.

“Could I be your best friend for a second here? Not your advisor or whatever?” Lexa gave a minute nod. “You’re falling in love.” The brunette’s head shot up to meet the nurse’s eyes.

“What are you talking about?”

“The blonde last night. I know jealousy when I see one, Lexa.”

“I was not…”

“Don’t take me for a fool Lexa. I’ve known you all our lives. Even under that cold mask you always front, I see _you_.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do. That’s the girl isn’t it?” Lexa nodded. “You know what you need to do. If she knew about us, she’d be a danger to us all.”

“You think I don’t know that? She doesn’t know anything. She came to me a some weeks back, she thought she was having harmless dreams, she didn’t know they were memories.”

“What? You’ve been talking to her and you never said a thing?”

“I do not need to tell you or anyone about anything. You remember who I am. I don’t answer to anyone.” Lexa snapped.

“Of course.” Anya bowed her head. A knock sounded through the office door. Then Clarke’s voice followed. Lexa glanced at her wall clock, the blonde was here for their meeting. She mumbled a quick ‘Come in’ and turned to Anya.

“Is that all?” The brunette asked though the dismissal was clearly heard.

“Yes Com-Dr. Woods.” The nurse didn’t bother raising her head, she could _feel_ the glare being directed to her. She shuffled towards the door, passed by a frowning Clarke.

“Did I interrupt something?” The blonde asked.

“No. Come in. Sorry about that.” The brunette grumbled. She took her usual seat at the recliner as did Clarke at the sofa.

“No, it’s okay.”

“So, how are you? Did the nightmares made an appearance last night?”

“I’m running on two hours of sleep. I took some of those sleeping pills I told you about but it didn’t help. The nightmare was the same as last time.”

“Having a night out with your boyfriend probably wasn’t helping either.” Lexa mumbled. She did not intend to let that one out. She prayed that Clarke wouldn’t hear it. But alas, no one heard her.

“Excuse me? What does that have to do with anything?” Clarke spat out, irritation lacing every word. The brunette sighed.

“It is common knowledge that if you lack sleep, you should catch up on sleep every chance you get. And not waste it getting cosy with your ‘friends’.” She emphasized that last word.

“My friends are not a waste of time. And you should really improve on your people skills ‘cause that stick is so high up your ass, you’re getting angry at me for something that is none of your business. And you know, I’m not the only one in that bar last night. Maybe you’re the one who needs to catch up on sleep so you won’t have to lash out on other people every time you and your girlfriend fights.” The brunette froze _._ Lexa clenched her jaw. The brunette wasn’t even angry, as Clarke put it. She was just frustrated and a little bit _jealous_.

“I’m sorry for overstepping my boundaries. Let’s get back to the subject beforehand.” The psychiatrist gritted out. Then every emotion on her face dropped, leaving her with her usual cold façade. The blonde seemed to realize what she just said. Her eyes widened, apologies on the tip of her tongue. Then the door opened to the same nurse they’d just been talking about. Her anger doubled.

“Uh, I’m sorry to interrupt but we could here you arguing outside.” Anya was looking everywhere but them.

“I’m sorry. Thank you for telling us Anya.” The nurse just nodded and left. They were left in an uncomfortable silence.

“She’s not my girlfriend.” The brunette offered.

“What?” Clarke asked, surprised that Lexa willingly gave her the information.

“Anya, she’s not my girlfriend. She’s my best friend. She followed me here from the city.” The psychiatrist explained.

“ _Oh_. I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say those things.” Clarke apologized weakly.

“Yes, you did.” Lexa replied dejectedly. The blonde opened her mouth to reply but Lexa just continued.  “I’m the one who’s sorry. I started it. I know what you do on your own time is none of my business. So, can we just return to the subject of this meeting?” The blonde scooted closer to the end of the couch, the one closer to the recliner. She took one of Lexa’s hands that were folded on her lap.

“I’m sorry, I know you’re just trying to help. And I don’t want whatever progress we made here go to waste because of what I’ve said. I love having you as my friend.” The blonde squeezed the hand in hers. Lexa’s countenance brightened. The dazzling smile she offered Clarke was brilliant.

“Yeah?” Lexa timidly asked, turning her hand on Clarke’s so they were palm to palm.

“Yes.” Clarke clasped their hands together in confirmation. She just stared at her for a long time before those blue eyes flickered down to Lexa’s lips. The brunette did the same. Slowly, they started leaning in without mind. Then as if the brunette caught up to her brain, she pulled away completely and cleared her throat. They both blushed.

“Uh, yeah.” The brunette suddenly looked sheepish. It was Clarke’s turn to smirk.

“Did I just make the great Dr. Lexa Woods blush?” The brunette just rolled her eyes. Clarke laughed.

“Shut up. Can we please go back to what we were talking about?”

“Yeah. Let’s.” Clarke wiped her eyes of the few tears that managed to leak out of laughing so hard. The brunette just glared at her and cleared her throat.

“Let’s talk about your first nightmares. Then we’ll build it up to the latest, is that okay?” Both women turned serious.

“Uh yeah. Well, the first I’ve had was me being woken up by my mother. I would hear my mother’s voice through my sleepy haze pleading for me to get up.” The blonde took a deep breath. “Then I would wake. It’s like I knew something was wrong just from the tone of my mother’s voice.” The brunette kept her eyes on the blonde. “Then I’d fully wake up. That would be the time that I would see my father moving around, putting clothes in my suitcase. And then he would hand me some of my clothes and tell me to change. I remember feeling nervous but I did what he said.” Tears were threatening to fall from the blonde’s eyes. The brunette sat next to Clarke and put her hand on the blonde’s arm for support.

“The next thing I know, there’s a loud bang from downstairs then footsteps all around the house, some coming up the stairs. My mother would tell me to get out through the window and out back where my Uncle Marcus would be. All of a sudden, my bedroom door would open and hooded figures would start dragging my parents away from me. The last thing that would happen was me screaming as hell and my mother saying that they love me.” Lexa handed Clarke the box of tissues from the coffee table.

“And you told me that some of these events are memories that you clearly remember from that night?” Lexa asked, her hands now on Clarke’s back drawing soothing circles. The blonde nodded. “Would you tell me what parts those are?”

“From the start until my mother telling me to go through the window. That was the last thing I remember from the house. The next thing I remember was Mr. Blake, the town Sheriff at the time, carrying me to the ambulance.” Lexa nodded.

“And what about your other dreams?”

“The other one began with a different memory from a completely different day, I think. I was on my way to the kitchen to get some water. I just woke up from a nap then I heard my name being whispered. So I hid, and I eavesdropped. They were arguing about me knowing something important. My mother wanted to wait for a little longer but my father said they waited enough and that they’d tell me that night. He said that it’s for their own safety that I know, and for my own. My father said that I was important then I’d hear his footsteps towards me so I ran upstairs. Then it would jump to that first dream again.”

“Do you know what they meant about you being important?” Clarke shook her head.

“I just thought they meant that I was important because I was their daughter. My father told me once that I deserved to be called a princess because I was his beautiful daughter. That’s how my friends got my nickname in the first place you know.” She gave Lexa a watery smile.

“And what changed? About your dream I mean.”

“It still starts the same, me being woken up. But instead of staying, I did what my mother said, I climbed out the window.”

“And how did you do that?”

“My father hung a rope ladder to the side of my window when I was 7, and no, I don’t know why.”

“So there was a rope ladder on the side of your window. What happened next?”

“I climbed down. I thought about stopping to see if my parents were looking from the window but I didn’t. I ran towards the tree line out back. Just as my Mom said, Uncle Marcus there.”

“Marcus? The one you said was your parents’ best friend on our previous sessions?” Clarke nodded. “Did he die on the fire too?”

“No. Just my parents.”

“Okay. After you saw your Uncle Marcus, what happened?”

“I went to him and begged him to go back to the house. He said he can’t and tried to pull me away from the house but I got away. I told him I’m not going without my parents. Next thing I saw was my bedroom on fire.” The blonde’s breath caught, clearly reliving her nightmare in her head. “T-then I saw my mom fighting someone off through the window. I screamed for my Mom.”

“You saw your mother fighting off someone? I thought there was fire?”

“I didn’t exactly see her but I know my Mom. I could see her silhouette through all the smoke and fire.”

“Okay. Continue please.”

“Uncle Marcus put a hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. Then I heard the front door slam open. Shots were fired all over the house. It didn’t stop for a while. I tried to run back to the house but he was quick to pull me towards the shadows again. He said he would check it out but I had to promise that I would be quiet and that I would not leave the confines of the shadow and make sure that no one would see me.”

“And did he? Go back to the house?”

“Yes, he went through the back door. Long minutes later, I saw the back door open again but it wasn’t my Uncle Marcus. I can’t tell who it was but I know he was not alone.” Lexa kept her hand on Clarke’s back all the while the blonde was telling her story. “He was holding someone by their neck. He leant over the other one and the one held by the throat would start thrashing and screaming. I didn’t know what was happening but somehow I knew he was killing him. A couple of minutes later, the screaming stopped. The flailing followed and then he dropped him. I remember the feeling of being terrified, not because of what happened, but because of what I saw.”

“And what did you see Clarke?”

“I saw the person staring right at me.”

“Are you saying you saw the killer?”

“No, just…just his eyes.”

“Can you explain?”

“Look, I don’t want you thinking that I’m crazy, okay? I’m just telling you my dream.” Lexa nodded. “Hi-his eyes were shining while he stared at me.” The brunette froze. Clarke waited for the brunette to pull away and send her to an asylum.

“What do you mean by shining?”

“His pupils were blazing gold.”

“Is that all that you saw?” Lexa’s question was curious. But Clarke just took it as the brunette’s nature to know everything.

“Yes, he took a step towards me but someone suddenly put their arms around me and that’s when I wake up.”

“Have you told anyone about this? Your best friend?” Clarke shook her head.

“It’s possible that your mind is just filling the blanks from that night with unrelated things. But it wouldn’t hurt to see where this goes.”

“So, what are we going to do?”

“Would you mind telling me everything you remember and everything that happened that day?” Clarke just stared at her. “I’d like to see if your memories are just coming back or it’s just your mind playing tricks.” The blonde thought about it for a minute, then nodded.

“I’m sorry about all of this.” Clarke motioned to herself and all the tissues on the floor. “This is why I didn’t want to speak about this in public.”

“Don’t worry about it Clarke. I know it’s hard but thank you for telling me all this.” The brunette’s hand is back on Clarke’s arm, squeezing for support.

“No, thank _you._ I never talked to anyone about this. The last time I did was when I was in the hospital after the fire, when the police took my statement. But with you I feel…I just trust you.”

“I’m glad you do.” The brunette smiled. She glanced at the clock, it’s nearly time for her to get off. She heard Anya’s heavy footsteps first before the door opened. She immediately removed her hand off Clarke’s arm and moved a few inches away from the blonde.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t know that you still have a patient.” Anya apologized. But Lexa knew that the nurse knew that the blonde was still there.

“You’d know, if you actually knocked before barging in.” Lexa spat out, clearly annoyed with her best friend’s behavior.

“Hi, I’m sorry. Lexa seemed to have forgotten her manners. I’m Anya. Lexa’s best friend.” Anya took a step towards Clarke and offered her hand, completely ignoring the psychiatrist. The blonde shook it, “I’m Clarke. I’m actually a doctor here, it’s just my day-off. This was just a friendly visit.”

“Nice to meet you. Anyway, I’m just here to ask if we’re still on for that coffee and tour. You said we could go after your shift.” She directed the question to Lexa.

“Yes, but it would have been nice if you let me at least say goodbye to Clarke.”

“I’ve got a better idea, why don’t we all go together? I’ve been here for two days and she’s the first friend of yours that I actually met. Is that alright with you Clarke?” Lexa stiffened. If looks could kill, Anya would be on the floor right now, bleeding out. _If I wanted, I probably could._ The nurse avoided Lexa’s glare and stared straight at Clarke. The blonde could feel the tension in the room and of course, the look on Lexa’s face was a clear evidence.

“Uh, I-I don’t know about, I don’t want to intrude. Maybe some other time.” The blonde stammered. It was getting awkward all of a sudden.

“Nonsense, do you have something else to do? You said it was your day-off.”

“Uh no, I don’t have anything else to do.”

“Then you should come, right Lexa?” Anya mustered every strength in her and met Lexa’s glare head-on. Lexa had to give it to her, having the courage to stand up to her like that. But then again, Anya was the only one who could do that, and Clarke. Lexa finally relented.

“It would be my pleasure Clarke if you could come.” She turned to the blonde and smiled genuinely.

“Okay.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this short chapter.


	4. The Spark

**CHAPTER IV.**

“So Clarke, what kind of doctor are you?” Anya started. The three of them sat on one of the booths at Grounder’s. Anya sat beside Lexa on one side of the table while Clarke sat on the other.

“I’m a trauma surgeon.”

“Oooh. You’re the first line of defense.” Clarke furrowed her brows at the weird analogy.

“Uh, yeah, something like that.” Anya smirked.

“Don’t listen to her Clarke. She’s just throwing you off, she’s weird like that.” Lexa piped in.

“Yeah, whatever Woods. Did you grow up here Clarke?” Anya continued questioning her until their names were called. The blonde couldn’t help but think that this was some kind of meet-the-parents level of interrogation. She can’t deny the closeness between the two. And she can’t help but feel a little bit jealous.

“How long have you been with your boyfriend Clarke?” Both she and Lexa choked on their coffees. Leave it to Anya to make everything awkward.

“Anya!” Lexa chastised while she dabbed a tissue on her mouth. Clarke was confused.

“What boyfriend? I’ve been hearing that a lot today.” The blonde asked.

“I only said it once,” was Lexa’s mumbled reply.

“One with the long-ish hair, with the black leather jacket.” Anya supplied. _What long-ish…oh God, Bell._ Clarke started laughing. Everyone always gets the same assumption.

“What’s funny?” Anya asked, now confused.

“You’re talking about Bell. He’s like my brother; I grew up with him. That’s practically incest.” Clarke’s nose scrunched in disgust. “Ew, God no. Not going to happen.” She shook her head for a good measure.

“Sure about that? You two looked… _couple-y_ last night,” came Lexa’s grumbled reply. Anya snickered. The psychiatrist just glared at her. _Is she…she’s jealous!_ Clarke was doing a victory dance internally.

“Uh no. That’s just normal for us. He and his little sister are cuddly people, that’s where I got it. We all shared a room when we were little so more often than not, we end up asleep next to each other after watching movies.” Lexa still had a frown on her face. “And I’ve got my eyes on someone else, I’d never go for him.” The statement was accompanied by the blonde’s intense stare directed at Lexa. The brunette blushed.

“Okay lovebirds, cut it out. I’m still here.” And then Anya happened. Lexa cleared her throat and excused herself from the table to go to the restroom, leaving a smirking Clarke and Anya.

“I like you Clarke.” The blonde’s eyes grew comically wide, misinterpreting what Anya had said. The nurse seemed to catch her mistake and scrunched her face, “Not like that!” She threw a crumpled tissue towards Clarke who was laughing her ass off. “But Lexa does. Likes you like that I mean.” Anya’s serious tone stopped Clarke’s laughing fit. _She likes me!_

“I like her too.” Clarke replied sheepishly.

“I can see that.” Anya paused. “Lexa, she doesn’t trust easily.”

“I know, I’m like that too.”

“So, all I’m saying is: if she really, _really_ , lets you in, please don’t freak out or anything okay?” Clarke’s face drew into a confused expression. “I mean…she’s just been through a lot okay? So I hope that if she lets you see the real her, you really _look_ at her. She’s a good person no matter what.” Clarke’s expression morphed into one of understanding.

“I promise to try.” Anya smiled genuinely at her.

“That’s all I needed to hear, you’re the first to get emotions out of her besides the usual anger and annoyance you know, myself and her closest friends excluded. It’s just been a really, really long time since I’ve seen her… _human_ side.”

“Really, really long time? You make it sound like she’s ancient.” Clarke giggled.

“Oh you have no idea.” Clarke’s curiosity perked up on that. She can’t tell if Anya was being serious or if she was just playing with her.

“No idea about what?” Lexa piped up as she retook her seat beside Anya.            

“Uh nothing, I was just telling how clumsy you were as a child. Did you know Clarke that Lexa here face-planted on horse dung when we were little?” Lexa’s wide, panicked eyes turned to her childhood best friend. _She wouldn’t dare. Oh God, she would._ But a full belly laugh from the blue-eyed blonde in front of her made the embarrassment worth it.

 

* * *

 

**L**

Lexa and Anya arrived at their shared living space a little after 9. The three of them, Clarke included, decided that it’d be best to catch up on some much needed sleep, especially Clarke. They all had a 4am- shifts the next day.

“What was that today Anya?” The psychiatrist gritted out as soon as the nurse closed the front door. Anya had hoped that Lexa would forget what she pulled at the brunette’s office earlier today since it all ended pretty well.

“What was what?” She asked innocently.

“Don’t play games with me Anya. You know what. How dare you challenge me like that?” The last part came out as a growl, her voice dipping to a lower octave, a sign that the brunette was starting to lose control. The nurse flinched.

“I’m sorry Commander. It wasn’t my intention to challenge you. I just wanted to know the girl.” Anya apologized with her head bowed.

“That’s _my_ decision! Not yours! If I wanted you to know the girl, I will say it!” Lexa stalked forward, like a predator trapping her prey.

“Yes, Commander. It will not happen again.”

“It better not. Or next time, best friend or not, you’ll know your place.” Anya knew that the threat wasn’t a bluff. Lexa sighed, “So, what did you gather after everything you put me through?” Lexa’s voice returned to normal. Anya took this as permission to return to best friend mode. The nurse smirked.

“She likes you.” Lexa just glared at her.

“That’s all you found out?”

“That and you like her too. I’ve never seen you blush like that in a long time, hell, I’ve never seen you _happy_ in a long time.” Anya teased.

“And that’s relevant how?”

“I just thought maybe you don’t have to force her to this, maybe she’d come willingly.”

“Willingly, _right_. She thinks I’m a killer.” Lexa stated glumly.

“What? A killer why? Have you killed anyone recently? Why would you do that? Did you really have to?” Lexa’s glare shut her up. Anya just smiled coyly.

“I didn’t kill anyone.”

“Then why?”

“She saw me that night.” Silence engulfed the whole room. Lexa’s stiff posture and stoic expression unsettled Anya. _She really likes her. She cares about what the girl thinks about her._ Anya thought.

“Oh. My. God. How?”

“She didn’t exactly _see_ me. She saw my eyes. There was fire and smoke all over the place, she couldn’t see me clearly. Her dreams, they weren’t tricks of her mind, they were memories. Her last dream, she saw me kill one of _them_. Her words were, ‘His pupils were blazing gold.’”

“Oh.”

“Yes, oh. Do you still think she’d come willingly?”

“Yes, I still think she will. You just have to tell her the truth.”

“She’s with _them_! She grew up in _their_ house! I don’t see how she’d believe me. I’m surprised _they_ haven’t told her anything yet.”

“I guess you just have to have faith in her.”

“Faith, like that’s going to help any. How many times have we put our faith on these people? And how many times have we been let down? How do I know she’s going to be different?”

“Maybe she’s different. Maybe she isn’t. But are you willing to risk _her_ faith in you by forcing her into all this? You can deny it all you want but you feel for her. And the others may say that you’re better off alone but we both know that’s not true. She _may_ let you down but at least you didn’t let _yourself_ down.” Anya left Lexa to ponder with what she said.

On the other side of town, Clarke is having her good night’s sleep at last after a long time of nightmares. Her dreams don’t involve death or fire. But it involved a green-eyed brunette and her dazzling smile. The blonde slept with a smile of her own.

 

* * *

 

**C**

Clarke entered the hospital with a coffee tray on hand and a smile on her face. She slept like a baby to a Lexa-filled dream. She pushed the up button the elevator. She arrived 15 minutes early to give Lexa and Anya a cup of coffee, knowing that her dreams had something to do with her talks with the psychiatrist.

She got off the Psych floor and walked through the familiar hallway. The hospital looked so barren this time of day and it gave Clarke the creeps.

“Boo.” Clarke’s breathing seized up in shock. Her hands stopped functioning, dropping the tray of coffee in the process. She looked at the culprit crouched in front of her with the tray of coffee in her hand. Anya.

“What the hell Anya?! I could’ve killed you!” She slapped the laughing nurse on the arm.

“Yeah? With what? Your scary face and limp hands?” Anya teased. She handed the coffee tray back to the still pale-faced blonde and resumed walking.

“You little shit! You could’ve wasted three cups of perfectly good coffee!” Clarke jogged towards the nurse that she guessed was on her way to Lexa’s office.

“Thank God for my fast reflexes then.”

“Screw you!” The blonde huffed.

“You’d love doing that, wouldn’t you?” Clarke’s eyes widened once again. This nurse really has no tact.

“Ew! Anya! Why would you say that?” Anya just laughed in response and pushed the door to Lexa’s office.

“Say what?” The psychiatrist asked without looking up from the papers she was reading.

“Clarke here wants to screw me.” Anya said nonchalantly. Lexa’s head snapped quickly to the two.

“Anya! Don’t listen to her Lexa. She’s being crazy.” Clarke defended. “Here Lexa have some coffee.” She handed a cup to the psychiatrist. She turned to Anya, “And just for that, you don’t get your coffee.”

“Hey! I take it back then! She didn’t say that.” Clarke just smirked at her and handed her a cup. Anya rolled her eyes and turned back towards the door. But before she could fully step out of the room, she threw out a retort, “But I bet she wants to screw you Lex!” Then ran out of the room.

Clarke was left gaping at the door while Lexa laughed at the blonde’s face.

“Uh-I...S-she…” Clarke stammered as she blushed furiously. The brunette just kept laughing. Clarke seemed to blink out of her stupor and blurted, “That was not true. I don’t want to screw you Lexa.” If possible, her face turned to another redder shade. Lexa just cocked an eyebrow as she took a sip from her cup of coffee.

“You don’t?” Lexa teased.

“Of course, I do! – I mean, I don’t. What? I mean…” Clarke stammered. Lexa started laughing again.

“Lexa! That wasn’t funny!” Clarke huffed with a pout. The brunette thought she was adorable.

“I-I’m sorry.” She spluttered in between laughs. Clarke just glared at her and started walking out the room. Before she could get far though, Lexa put a hand on her arm and pulled. The brunette was smiling. “Thank you for the coffee Clarke. And I’m sorry.” The blonde doctor just rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless.

“Don’t worry about it. I’d take the embarrassment any day if I get to hear you laugh like that.” It was the brunette’s turn to flush. Lexa didn’t say anything, instead she leaned in and placed a kiss on Clarke’s cheek. She let go of Clarke’s arm and walked back to her office with a smile on her face.

The blonde couldn’t wipe the smile off her face all day long.

 

* * *

 

**L**

Despite her usual indifference, Lexa’s eyes were absolutely radiant the whole day. Anya was right, she hadn’t been this happy for a long time. Anya had been smirking all day whenever she saw her. The nurse would waggle her eyebrows irritatingly and _God_ , what Lexa would give just to pummel her best friend right then and there.

Lexa knew from the first time she saw the girl that Clarke was beautiful. Even when there was 100-pounds of bags under her eyes, her smile was a breath of light. She was distracted by her musings when her phone vibrated from her lab coat pocket.

[Clarke Griffin (Monday – 6:51pm): Hey, I’m sorry but I have to cancel our meeting for tonight. L. I have to do a straight shift. Hunting gone wrong, at least 5 are seriously injured.]

Lexa frowned. 5 injured? What the hell happened? She typed a quick reply to Clarke…

[Lexa (Monday – 6:54pm): Don’t worry about it. Patients come first. Go save lives, Princess. Text me if you have the time. J. Don’t forget to eat.]

[Clarke Griffin (Monday – 6:57pm): Will do. And yes, I’ll eat. Drive safe, don’t let Anya distract you with her weirdness. xx]

The smile was back on Lexa’s face in a matter seconds.

“What are you smiling about? Are you sexting Clarke?” A pencil whizzed past Anya’s head. The nurse just really had timing. “Hey! That could’ve hit me!” She protested.

“The next one _will_ hit you if you don’t say why you’re here quickly.” Lexa spat.

“There’s been an incident.” Lexa’s posture immediately tensed. She looked at Anya and motioned for her to close the door. After the nurse had sat, she nodded for her to continue. “Indra and a few others were on their way here, but they stumbled upon some of _them_.”

“What do you mean stumbled? And why were they on their way here?” Lexa’s voice was low and hard.

“I don’t know what happened. Indra said they got away unscathed but they had to roughen up _the others_.”

“That was the hunting incident Clarke was talking about. Roughen up? Trauma is about to receive at least 5 severely injured men. How is that roughening up?!” Anya recoiled. Lexa’s last sentence came out as a growl. “Where are they now?” The psychiatrist asked.

“They were on their way to the Griffin house when they encountered _them_. They took a detour. They’re at our house now.”

“Tell them to stay put. No one leaves that house without my direct order. And tell them that their insubordination would not go unpunished, that includes yours.” Anya visibly gulped. “Now, _they_ know we’re back here. And that we’re coming for Clarke. You just made this harder than it already is.”

“I’m sorry Commander.” Lexa’s eyes shot to Anya’s. All her eyes were black but her pupils, they were glowing gold.

“Go. Now!” Her voice has completely morphed into its true form. Anya shot up from her seat, phone in hand already dialing Indra’s number.

 

* * *

 

 

“What the hell were you all thinking coming here? And on foot nonetheless? We have cars for that. So people won’t be suspicious!” Lexa’s voice grew louder as she talked. Anya was right beside her, head bowed like the rest of them were. “Speak now.” The brunette ordered. They were back at the house and as she ordered, no one has left. The four in question: Indra, Gustus, Maia and Eli, all stood in front of their Commander. Blood were all over their person.

“We were told that Nia and her coven are on their way here and that they’re supposed to arrive two weeks from now. Coming here on foot was faster than the cars, we had to warn you. They said they were coming for the girl.” The dark-skinned woman, Indra, replied. Lexa’s eyes darkened, face stripped of any emotion.

“Who told you that?” Came Lexa’s growl.

“One of their defects came to us, Echo was her name.”

“Is she to be trusted?” The four newcomers looked at each other. Lexa’s anger grew, “I asked if she is to be trusted.”

“Yes Commander.” The tallest of the four, Gustus, replied.

“Why didn’t you just call?”

“Commander, no one outside our coven knew about the girl.”

“Are you saying that there’s a traitor among our coven?”

“The defect confirmed it, Commander. All our phones are connected to one network; we couldn’t risk it.” Lexa growled low. Everything was turning for the worst.

“Does the defect know who the traitor is?”

“No, Commander. She said that the traitor only communicated with Nia and nobody else.”

“And what would the traitor think of almost all my trusted advisors leaving the coven all at once?”

“Titus made it seem like we were going to investigate deaths all over our territories Commander.”

“Good. And does anyone else know of the defect?”

“No Commander, just us, your advisors, and a couple of your trusted guards.”

“Maia, Eli, you’ll return tonight. Stay close to the roads, _they’re_ probably scouring the woods as we speak. If you have to, take the long way back to the coven. Present Echo as the newest member of our coven when you get there and make it seem like she gave us very valuable information. Cut off all the outside communications for a while and say that it’s just maintenance work. Guard every passage of the mansion, even the underground ones. Only our trusted guards, remember that. Monitor the network, look for something, anything odd. The fucker would surely be panicking and looking for a way out. Go now.” The two bowed their heads and left. “Indra, Gustus, you two stay here. If what Echo said was true, I’ll need you to look out for them.”

“Yeah, like a bunch of people coming in to town together is hard to point out.” Anya mumbled, all heads turned to her, glaring.

“Did you have something _helpful_ to say Anya?” The psychiatrist growled. The nurse flinched, and shook her head. “I didn’t think so.” Lexa turned to the two. “That’s all, you’re free to use the spare bedrooms upstairs. I’m going back to the hospital, check out the mess you made.” She glared at them once again for good measure and walked out the door.

At the hospital, Clarke was just calling the death of the fifth patient who came in. She was about to cover him up when something odd caught her attention. A bruise in the shape of a hand was just forming around his neck.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, thank you for all the love you've been giving this story. I honestly didn't know that this will garner such views. Thank you!


	5. Calm Before The Storm

**CHAPTER V.**

**L**

[Clarke Griffin (Wednesday – 6:24am): Hey, just got off from work, on my way to the locker room. I’m sorry we couldn’t meet yesterday. L. xx]

Lexa let out a small smile at the message. Ever since the hunting accident, Lexa has been busy watching out for Nia’s coven to come. Indra and Gustus have been waiting every day hiding in the shadows of the woods, out of _their_ way of course, they won’t risk another altercation. They got word the day before that the traitor was apprehended. He was one of Lexa’s generals and he confirmed that Nia was to arrive in two weeks’ time.

She hadn’t seen Clarke for two days. Their schedules had prevented it.

[Lexa (Wednesday – 6:29am): I’m sorry too. Go home now Princess. Get some rest. x]

[Clarke Griffin (Wednesday – 6:30am): Would you like to get some coffee with me today? xx]

Lexa let out a small laugh. Clarke was such a dork.

[Lexa (Wednesday – 6:31am): I’d love to. But how about your rest? x]

[Clarke Griffin (Wednesday – 6:31am): Really? J. Don’t worry about my rest. I just want to see you. xx]

Lexa’s cheeks flushed.

[Lexa (Wednesday – 6:32am): J. Okay, how about Grounder’s in 30? I start my shift at 8. x]

[Clarke Griffin (Wednesday – 6:31am): Got it. See you there beautiful, be careful. xx]

* * *

 

Clarke arrived at the Grounder’s 30 minutes later. Lexa was already on their usual booth with two cups of coffee in hand. The brunette had already taken the liberty to order for the blonde while she waited as she had arrived 10 minutes earlier than Clarke.

“Hey. I thought you said 30?” Clarke teased as she took her coffee from the blushing brunette. Instead of taking the seat on the other side of the table, she took a seat beside the brunette.

“I didn’t take in to account the short drive here. I left the house as I would if I were to jog.” The brunette saved.

“Good one.” The blonde pointed out. The brunette just smirked. “So how are you?”

“I’m fine, how about you?”

“Just fine.” Awkward silence.

“I missed –…”

“I‘ve been - …” The two blushed a furious red. Clarke gestured for Lexa to continue.

“I’ve just been wondering. Uh,” the brunette stalled, “would you like to go out to dinner with me some time?” Clarke smiled brightly while the brunette flushed.

“Of course Lexa, I’d love to have dinner with you.” The blonde leaned in and placed a kiss on Lexa’s cheek.

“Yeah?” Lexa’s had a small, genuine smile on her face.

“Yes.” The psychiatrist’s smile grew wider. She lost herself on those ocean blue eyes staring at her with such _affection_. She slowly lifted a hand towards Clarke’s face and gently brushed her cheek with the back of her it while the other cupped the blonde’s cheek. She leaned in and softly, chastely kissed the blonde on the lips. The kiss was short-lived though because Lexa pulled away thinking that she moved too fast when Clarke didn’t respond.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” Lexa apologized. She looked everywhere _but_ Clarke. The blonde thought that if she wasn’t literally blocking the brunette’s way out, she would’ve been out the door by now.

“Hey, Lexa. Hey. Look at me.” Clarke demanded. Lexa did and the blonde’s heart broke with the regret and sadness she saw reflecting at the brunette’s eyes. “Never apologize for doing that. I-I liked it.” Lexa’s eyes snapped up at Clarke’s.

“Really?” Clarke nodded. “But you didn’t...” Lexa mumbled, her eyes downcast once again.

“I know, and I’m sorry. I was just…caught off guard. That’s all.”

“You don’t have to make excuses for me Clarke, I can underst – …” Lexa was cut off by a pair of lips on hers. The brunette felt herself immediately responding, eagerly pressing back. Lexa’s senses immediately filled with _Clarke_ : Clarke’s taste, Clarke’s touch, Clarke’s _scent_ and it was intoxicating. The blonde’s hands were on her hair and her hands were on Clarke’s waist. Their knees were pushing up against one another and their position was awkward as hell but they didn’t mind, as long as their lips stayed pressed against each other’s.

The kiss was broken up by Clarke accidentally spilling her coffee all over their table. The two pulled away, blushing. They quickly dumped a few tissues on the table to prevent the coffee from spilling over the edges. A giggle made it out of Clarke’s throat.

“Well that was unexpected.”

“It was.” Lexa conceded as she bit her lip.

“So dinner, where is the good doctor Dr. Woods taking me?”

“That’s for me to know and for you to keep guessing on.”

“Really? Not even a hint?”

“Nope.” Lexa smirked at the blonde’s pouting face. “And what were you trying to tell me earlier, might I ask?”

“Uh…” The blonde blushed a beautiful shade of red.

The brunette’s eyes landed on the wall clock, it was nearing 7:40, and she’d be late. “Oh shit, I’m sorry. I have to go; my shift’s in 20.” The blonde quickly stood up so the brunette could get out of her seat. She accompanied the psychiatrist out towards her car.

“I missed you.” Clarke mumbled slowly. Lexa, who already opened her car door, stopped short.

“What?”

“Earlier, I was trying to tell you I missed you.” Clarke explained. The next the blonde felt was Lexa’s lips on her own, fiercely pressing against hers.

“I missed you too. Now I really have to go. Please refrain from saying sweet things to me or I’ll never leave. I’ll text you with details on our dinner.” The brunette explained breathlessly. Clarke took a step back with a grin on her face.

“Okay, okay, go! Be careful, don’t drive too fast.” The psychiatrist backed out slowly of the parking lot and drove away. Both women went on with their day with the same lingering smiles.

* * *

 

**C**

“Raven? You here?” Clarke bellowed from the living room of the house.

“Yup. I’ll be down in a minute.” Raven shouted from somewhere inside the house. A minute later, Raven came bounding down the stairs in a tank top and skinny jeans, jacket in hand. “What’s up?”

“She kissed me.” Clarke said with a squeal.

“Who? Dr. Green Eyes?” Raven excitedly asked.

“Yes! And she asked me to dinner!” Clarke stated dreamily as she plopped down the sofa.

“God Clarke, you look like a lovesick puppy! Please tell me you didn’t look like that when you met her. You’re totally being obvious.”

“I am not!” The blonde defended.

“Yes, you are! All the blushing and mooneyes make you look like you’re in love with her.” The Latina smirked when the blonde only blushed further. “Oh God! You totally are! You’re in love with the goody-two-shoes, pain in the ass psychiatrist!”

“Rae, she’s beautiful and, and understanding. Underneath that stoic mask she wore is a kind, thoughtful and sweet woman. Rae, she’s…she’s amazing. Every time she looks at me, she makes me feel like I’m the only one she sees that mattered.” Clarke paused. “Am I going too fast with this?” Clarke asked in a small voice.

“Oh hun, you’re not. You’ve practically been with her for what, almost 4 months now. As long as she makes you feel like you do, nothing really matters. Do you think she feels the same too?” Raven asked gently as she took a seat next to the blonde.

Clarke replayed their moments before the brunette took off for work. The blonde genuinely smiled at the memory. “Yes, I think she does.”

“Well then, that’s your answer!” Raven smiled at her best friend. She’s never seen Clarke smile like that in a long time, not since her parents died.

“Thank you Rae.” Clarke gratefully thanked her best friend.

“Don’t think all these doesn’t come with something Griffin.” Raven smirked. Clarke just rolled her eyes, typical Raven. “It’s nothing grand, I just want to meet this Lexa Woods.”

“Urgh, do you have to?” Clarke whined.

“Of course!” Raven said in mock-offense. “What kind of best friend do you think I am?”

“Okay, okay! Can we just please do the meet-the-best friend thing _after_ the dinner? I don’t want you to scare her off.” Raven smiled smugly.

“Fine. So does that mean I can tell the others that you’re _officially_ dating the good doctor?”

“Raven!” The Latina just laughed. She got off the couch and to the kitchen to prepare some much needed breakfast for both herself and her best friend.

* * *

 

Clarke spent the rest of the day sleeping until 2pm. Her shift wasn’t for another 3 hours so she decided to drop by the Blake household first. She’d been trying to hold it off, scared that the nightmares will return. She took a quick shower, put on a grey, long-sleeved shirt and her black skinny jeans and she was on her way to the Blake’s.

She parked her car at 3pm on the Blake’s driveway. Octavia met her at the door with a surprised but pleased smile.

“Clarke! You’re here!” Octavia threw her arms out for a hug which Clarke gladly reciprocated.

“Did I hear correctly? Is Clarke Griffin finally visiting dear, old Uncle Blake?” A familiar voice piped in behind Octavia.

“Uncle! Oh God, what happened to you?” Clarke concern flared up the moment she saw the bandages on her Uncle’s torso.

“Eh, don’t worry about it. Just an accident a couple of nights ago.” The old man waved it off as she let the blonde in. Octavia’s face darkened for a moment before returning to its cheery countenance.

“Why didn’t you call me? Or at least went to the hospital? I could’ve checked you up.” The blonde exclaimed as she sat on the sofa in the living room.

“That’s what I said. But both of them just won’t listen. They said it wasn’t a big deal. Clarke do you want anything? Water? Juice? Tea? Coffee?” Octavia asked.

“Water’s fine O, thank you.” Octavia nodded and proceeded towards the kitchen. Then Clarke processed the first part of Octavia’s rant. “Wait, both? They? Who’s the other one?” As if on cue, Bellamy came down the stairs with bandage wrapped around the side of his head and a few scratches all over his face and arms. “What the hell? What happened to you Bell?” Clarke stood up, immediately hugging her friend.

“Uh nothing, just an accident a couple of nights ago.”

“Both you and Uncle kept saying it was an accident. What the hell – …” Clarke remembered the 5 men rushed to the hospital Monday night. “Oh God, you were with that hunting accident weren’t you?” Both men went rigid at the mention of the incident.

“How did you know that?” Bell asked the blonde.

“I was on duty when they were rushed in. Those were pretty severe injuries. 2 of them died, 1 on my table! What the hell happened?”

“Just that, hunting accident. Don’t worry about it Princess. Just a couple of _wild monsters_.” Her Uncle Blake answered from the sofa. His voice dripped venom on those last two words. What kind of animal can do that much damage?

“You’re overthinking everything Princess.” Bell ushered the blonde back to the living room. Octavia came out the kitchen with a pitcher of water on one hand and a couple glasses on the other.

“Why only two glasses O? There’re four of us here.” Bell asked his sister.

“I’ve only got two hands doofus. How do you suppose I carry the pitcher and all the glasses?” Octavia grumbled.

“You could’ve gotten the tray, so you didn’t have to carry them with your bare hands.” The older Blake rolled his eyes.

“I couldn’t find the tray.” Clarke was trying hard not to laugh at the Blake siblings’ antics, same as their father who was red in the face. It made the questions temporarily go away.

“It’s on top of the fridge.”

“Then _you_ should’ve gotten them all by yourself, smartass. Who would put a tray on top of the fridge?” Octavia shot back, clearly annoyed.

“Childen, children. Behave.” The oldest Blake chastised through laughs.

* * *

 [Lexa Woods (Thursday – 9:33am): Hey, Clarke, good morning. You on your way home? x]

Clarke just changed out of her scrubs into her grey, long-sleeved shirt and skinny jeans when she received the message. Her shift has been incredibly boring, not that she wanted people getting hurt. That just means no one seemed to be stupid enough to cause themselves some serious injury.

[Clarke (Thursday – 9:39am): Good morning Dr. Woods. ;). Still at the hospital, just about to go home. Why? xx]

[Lexa Woods (Thursday – 9:41am): I was just thinking about that dinner. Would you mind if I changed it up to lunch? Since our schedules won’t allow dinner. x]

[Clarke (Thursday – 9:43am): No, it’s okay. Lunch is fine. J. As long as it’s with you, it’s fine. xx]

[Lexa Woods (Thursday – 9:44am): Great. Text me your address and I’ll pick you up at 11. x]

[Clarke (Thursday – 9:45am): Wait, now?]

[Lexa Woods (Thursday – 9:47am): Yes, is that alright?]

[Clarke (Thursday – 9:47am): Way to give a girl a warning Woods. But yes its fine. ;). I’ll text you my address later. But wait, don’t you have to go to work at 11?]

[Lexa Woods (Thursday – 9:50am): Sorry for springing this up without prior notice but I don’t want to delay this any longer than I need to. And as for my duty, I got someone to cover for me for a few hours, so get moving Griffin.]

[Clarke (Thursday – 9:53am): Aw, that’s so sweet! J. Okay, okay, driving. But what do I have to wear?]

[Lexa Woods Calling …] Clarke rolled her eyes. _Predictable_.

“Hi.”

_“Clarke Griffin, you better not be driving or I’ll hit you myself.”_ Clarke couldn’t help the smile that blossomed on her face. Granted that she doesn’t want hearing/seeing Lexa worried and agitated, but it’s nice to feel cared for sometimes.

“Relax, I just got in my car. I’m not driving. I’m not stupid.”

_“Good. By the way, wear comfy clothes. Bye.”_ Then the brunette ended the call. The blonde sat on her car gaping. _That bitch_.

An hour and a few outfit changes later, Clarke heard Lexa’s car pull up outside their house. Raven was squealing like hell, Clarke thought she would blow an eardrum.

[Lexa Woods (Thursday – 11:01am): Hey gorgeous, I’m right outside your house. Come out when you’re ready. xx]

“Raven! Get a hold of yourself!” Clarke hissed. Her nerves were on overdrive.

“I’ve never seen you like this before. I mean, I’ve seen you getting ready for dates before. But I never saw you _nervous_ before.” Raven smirked.

“Shut up Reyes. How do I look?” Clarke chose to go with a pair of fitted, black shorts that ended up mid-thigh and a loose, light-grey, off-shoulder shirt and a pair of black, knee high boots. She had on little to no make-up: just mascara, eyeliner, lipstick and a light foundation. She put her hair on a couple of braids on each side that met at middle on the back of her head.

“You look fantastic. Now go, don’t keep your date waiting.”

“Thank you Rae. I’ll talk to you later.” She pocketed her phone and picked up her bag. She glanced at her reflection on the body mirror once again and smiled. She hugged Raven one last time then went out the door.

* * *

**L**

Clarke walked out the door and damn, she looked _amazing_. Lexa immediately got out of her car and met the blonde halfway.

“Hey. You look, you look stunning Clarke.” The blonde blushed at the compliment.

“You too. God, Lexa, you look _beautiful_.” Clarke replied breathlessly. The brunette was wearing her usual dark jeans, a white, button-up blouse and a pair of black high heels. Her hair was pulled to the side and her lips were painted red.

Lexa couldn’t help but kiss the blonde. She’d never felt like this all her life. They both pulled away with a smile on their lips.

“We should go.” Lexa whispered. Clarke cleared her throat and nodded.

“Yeah, lead the way Dr. Woods.” Lexa smirked and started walking back to her car. The brunette pulled the car door open and offered her hand for Clarke to get in. “So chivalrous.” Clarke teased as she sat comfortably. Lexa mock-bowed and closed the door.

The brunette started the car as soon as she closed the door and put her seatbelt on. She looked over at Clarke. The blonde was blushing so hard, she looked like she was about to explode.

“Clarke, what’s wrong?” The brunette asked as she drove away from Clarke’s.

“N-nothing.”

“Clarke.”

“I’ll show you later. You’re driving.”

Twenty minutes into the drive, Clarke had already asked a total of 17 questions, all were variations of the question ‘where are we going?’

“Clarke, seriously. You’re like a child. Relax.”

“That’s easy for you to say. _You_ know where we’re going, _I_ don’t. And where the hell is this? I’ve been living here all my life and _I’ve_ never been anywhere near here before.” The blonde was starting to get agitated.

“Hey. We’re alright. I know where I’m going. It’ll just be a few more minutes. Trust me, okay? Just try and relax. Can you do that for me?” The brunette’s idle hand found the blonde’s and gently squeezed it. Clarke sighed and nodded.

“I’m sorry Lexa. I do trust you. It’s just, ever since that night, I’ve never been fond of the woods again.”

“I know, and I understand. Just let me show you this and if you really can’t stay, we’ll go home okay?”

“Okay.”

Lexa turned up to a dirt road just a few moments later. The trees seemed to be much taller and bulkier on the area. The brunette stopped the car after a few meters out the main road. Lexa got out and opened the door for Clarke.

“Lexa seriously, where are we?” The blonde asked, her voice had tinged with anxiety. Lexa led them to a path going through the tall trees. It wasn’t exactly a path frequently walked on, but you could still make out the track marks where the grass had been stepped on.

“We’re on the other side of the woods you’re familiar with. As you know, the town is surrounded by the forest on ALL sides. This part’s the most undisturbed one but it also has the most beautiful spots.”

“It’s probably the creepiest part of the woods too. Seriously Lexa, how did you know about this place? You’re not some kind of psycho killer luring me to your precious lair just to try and harvest my skin or something, are you?” The brunette let out a loud laugh. The blonde could be very dramatic if she wanted to.

“No, I’m not Clarke. And to answer your question on how I found this place, I jog a lot you know. I took this route one day, that’s when I stumbled upon it.” The brunette stopped walking, Clarke followed suit. “Hey, do you trust me?” Lexa asked in a small, timid voice.

“Of course.” The blonde’s eyes were soft. A smile played at her lips at Lexa’s cuteness. The brunette presented a piece of cloth that suspiciously looked like a blindfold. The blonde gulped, her worry rising up again.

“Will you wear this for me?”

“Uh, f-for what? I mean, d-do I have to?”

“You don’t have to, Clarke. I just wanted it to be a surprise for you. I promise I’ll hold on to your hand. And I’ll never let go, no matter what.” The brunette held the blonde’s hand tightly on hers.

“Never? Promise?”

“Never Clarke. I promise.” The blonde eventually nodded. Lexa let out a small smile. She raised her hands, even the one holding Clarke’s, and slowly put the blindfold on Clarke’s face. The brunette made sure that it wasn’t too tight but that it wasn’t too loose for the blonde to see right through it either. Slowly, she urged Clarke to keep walking. The blonde was nervous as hell but Lexa’s hand on hers made it easier. She heard bushes rustling. The brunette gently pulled her back to make her stop. “Ready?” Lexa asked. The blonde nodded.

Lexa slowly undid the knot tying the blindfold behind Clarke’s head and let it fall to the ground. The blonde was astonished with what she saw when she opened her eyes. In front of her was a pond in the middle of a small clearing. There was a picnic blanket under a huge tree. The specific tree stood out because of its red leaves in a sea of green. It was… _magical._ The blonde was speechless.

“Do you like it?” Lexa asked.

“Like it? God, Lexa, I love it! This, this is _amazing_. You’re amazing.” The blonde turned around and kissed the smiling brunette on the lips. The kiss was all lips and tongues. It felt like forever before they stopped kissing.

“I’m glad you loved it. I know I should’ve asked if you were comfortable with me bringing you here. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“Don’t apologize Lexa. To think that I would’ve missed all this if I let my fear take over, it’s devastating. Thank you for bringing me here.”

“You’re welcome.” The brunette led them to the picnic blanket. The two women sat side by side with their backs against the tree trunk and their clasped hands in between. Lexa reached around the tree trunk for the hidden picnic basket. There were a variety of sandwiches and beverages and a few containers of salads and pastas. To say that they had _plenty_ to choose from was a huge understatement.

“How did you even manage to set this all up?” Lexa smirked.

“Well, you did say I’m the ‘high and mighty Lexa’. I’m just living up to the name.”

“Add know-it-all and conceited, you’re on the right track.” The blonde rolled her eyes.

“I had Anya come out here before I went to pick you up. She laid out everything.” The blonde nodded. She unwrapped one of the sandwiches and took a bite. Lexa choked on her carbonara when Clarke _moaned_.

“God, did Anya cook all this too?”

“I-I did.” Lexa replied shyly. Clarke’s eyes flew open.

“You cook?”

“Uh yeah, I mean, not always, but I learned.”

“Wow. You should give your teacher something grand. They sure knew how to teach.”

“That would be impossible as she is dead.” Clarke froze. Lexa’s voice was low and hard. She glanced up at the brunette, her eyes were distant and her face wore a cold expression.

“I-I’m sorry. I, I didn’t mean to bring up memories.” The blonde couldn’t help but berate herself internally for being so garrulous. Clarke’s voice seemed to shake Lexa out of her stupor.

“Shit, I’m sorry Clarke. I didn’t know why I said that.”

“No, it’s okay. I’m sorry if I’m being too familiar. I know we don’t really know each other very well. I mean, of course you do, you’re my therapist. Not that it means that’s all you mean to me. I mean, I just, I don’t really know anything about you except for what you told me last Saturday and what Anya told me on Monday.” Lexa smiled fondly at Clarke’s rant.

“You know you could ask me anything you want, right?” Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand that never left hers ever since she blindfolded the girl.

“Okay, uhm, if it’s okay, I’d like to know who taught you how to cook. They seem important to you.” Lexa stiffened for a few seconds before slumping against the tree trunk again.

“Her name was Costia. She was a…previous lover.” Lexa’s voice cracked at the end. That’s how Clarke knew she was holding back tears.

“Oh.” Clarke’s stomach churned. _I’m such an idiot._ “You don’t have to tell me Lexa. If you’re not ready to, I won’t force you.”

“No, I want to tell you Clarke, please let me?” The blonde was taken by Lexa’s _sincerity_ that all she could do was nod. “Costia was a beautiful woman. She was smart, kind, thoughtful, passionate but also _very stubborn._ ” Lexa cracked a small smile at that. “We met when we were 10. She was a healer’s daughter on our town, a doctor. One night, I had an altercation with one of my _friends_ , that would be Anya,” Clarke giggled. Typical Anya, “and I was sent to her by my father. And back at our town, what my father said, everyone else did. So, I came to her, bloody and bruised, and I kept pushing her hand away to try and get her to leave. I didn’t need her to heal me.” Clarke squeezed Lexa’s hand when the brunette looked like she had gotten lost with the memories.

“Sorry. So then my patience ran out eventually and I shouted at her. I said that if she didn’t stop touching me, I’d get my father to throw her in jail somehow. You know what she did? She slapped me on the back of my head and said, ‘Do what you have to do, but I swear to everything that’s holy, I’ll add another bruise to your body if you don’t let _me_ do what _I_ have to do.’” Clarke laughed at that. The woman sounded amazing and the blonde couldn’t help but doubt herself. _Could I really compete with that?_

“I was dumbfounded. No one really stood up against me like that. Sure, most kids my age liked to rile me up because I was the daughter of the most powerful man in town, but they never really did it on my face. No one acts like that in front of me and gets away scathe-free, except for her. I started coming to her after that just to try and get her to argue with me. She’s one of the few who wasn’t afraid of my father. There were four of us: me, Anya, Costia and Gustus. I was 15 when I realized that I was in love with her. My aim started to change: I’d go to her just to get her to smile, get her to laugh, and just make her happy.”

“You know the face-planting on a horse dung thing?” Clarke nodded. She couldn’t forget that story even if she wanted to. “Yeah, that was because of Costia. She wanted this rare-colored butterfly. I got Anya to come with me out on the fields to look for the butterfly. We spent all day just walking around. Then there was one. I was so excited I started to run towards it with the open jar in my hand. I wasn’t looking where I was going so I tripped on a stick and then the face-planting happened. I never got the butterfly, but the laugh that that story got out of Costia was worth it.” Lexa said wistfully.

“She sounds amazing Lexa.” Clarke said with her own smile. Clarke couldn’t deny that Costia made Lexa happy. And she was thankful for that.

“She was.”

“I wish I could’ve met her.”

“She would’ve liked you. And you would’ve liked her too. You two would’ve been like two peas in a pod.” Lexa grumbled.

“I like her now. And she makes you smile. That makes me like her more.” The blonde grinned. That made Lexa’s tears fall. Clarke panicked, thinking she did something wrong. “Oh God, Lexa. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” The brunette just shook her head and wiped her tears away with the back of her idle hand.

“You didn’t upset me Clarke, you’re just so goddamned sweet. And you don’t even try.” The brunette kissed Clarke fiercely, pouring all her emotions on that one kiss.

“I really, _really_ , like you, Lexa.” The blonde said breathlessly.

“I really, _really_ , like you too, Clarke.” The brunette replied with a grin. Then Lexa remembered something. “Hey, what was that that got you all flustered after we took off from your house? You said you’d show it to me.” The blonde’s face immediately turned red as she looked away.

“I was hoping you had forgotten about that.” Clarke grumbled.

“Nope. Now show me what it is.”

Clarke got her phone out of her pocket. She pressed a few things and handed it to Lexa.

[Raven Reyes (Thursday – 11:09am): Damn Princess, you’ve got one hot piece of ass right there! You definitely have to tell me all about this ‘lunch’ later including the dessert: both food and non-food, especially the non-food.]

[Raven Reyes (Thursday – 11:09am): Stop sucking faces! You’re getting me hot and bothered here!]

[Clarke (Thursday – 11:10am): Stop being a creep and get off the damn window Raven! And please stop texting me with things like that. Matter of fact, stop texting me altogether. I’ll see you when I get home.]

Clarke waited with bated breath for Lexa’s reaction. The brunette’s face was blank as she stared at the screen of Clarke’s phone. Then a loud boisterous laugh rang out throughout the woods. Clarke watched as Lexa laughed and all she could think about was, ‘ _Now I’m making it my goal to get you to smile, get you to laugh and just be happy for the rest of your life’_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delayed posting guys. I've been swamped with work. Hope you liked this chapter.


	6. The Storm: Part I

**CHAPTER VI.**

**L**

“Commander.” Indra kneeled down in greeting. It was four days before Nia’s arrival and Lexa had sent for her few trusted guardians to join her in case a fight ensues.

“Rise, Indra. Speak.” Lexa commanded. She just got off from her hospital duty. She was seated on her swivel chair inside her study, which temporarily served as her throne and throne room, respectively.

“The 23 guardians you sent for are on their way here. Maia and Eli are among them. They spread out just as you commanded as to avoid suspicion. They’ll arrive at sun down.”

“Good. I need them alive. Nia’s arrival is near and we have to be prepared. Her coven is not one to be trifled with. They do not live by our rules.”

“I agree Commander. Though I have some concerns, Commander.”

“What is it?”

“They’re stronger than most of us. As you said, they do not live by our rules. How long do you think we could hold them up?

* * *

 

[Clarke Griffin (Thursday – 9:47am): Hi babe! Just got off work. I’m going out with Raven, Bell and O tonight since it’s my night off. Is there any chance that you could come? They’ve been wanting to meet you since last week. PS: I miss you beautiful. xx]

[Lexa (Thursday – 9:52am): Good morning Clarke. Of course, I’ll be there! I did a straight shift this morning so I’m free till tomorrow morning. When and where are you meeting? PS: I miss you too. x]

[Clarke Griffin (Thursday – 9:54am): You know that bar where you got jealous ‘cause you saw me cuddling with Bell, that’s where. Pick me up at 8?]

[Lexa (Thursday – 9:57am): I was not jealous! But okay, I’ll pick you up at 8.]

[Clarke Griffin (Thursday – 9:59am): You so were! You even lashed out on me that day after!]

[Lexa (Thursday – 10:00am): Okay fine! I was. But I remember I was not the only one lashing out. You even called Anya my girlfriend. Does that mean you were jealous too? ;)]

[Clarke Griffin (Thursday – 10:02am): No comment. And speaking of Anya, is she available too? I’d like it if she could come too.]

[Lexa (Thursday – 10:03am): You know Anya. She’d rather be absent at work than be absent at a good night out. We’ll both be there.]

[Clarke Griffin (Thursday – 10:05am): Well that’s settled then. I’ll see you both later tonight. I have to go now; I have to drive. Be safe okay? xx]

[Lexa (Thursday – 10:06am): See you! I’ll be safe if you do! x]

“Hey Anya, you up for a night out?” The brunette still sat at her swivel chair while her best friend lounged at the sofa in front of the fire place.

“Of course! Do you really have to ask? Where are we going and who’s going to be there?” Anya jumped off the couch excitedly.

“That bar we went to the first night you were here. Clarke invited us to meet her friends.”

“You two really are serious.” Lexa rolled her eyes.

“We are serious.”

“Have you told her you love her?”

“What? Just because we’re being serious doesn’t mean I love her.”

“I didn’t hear a denial Lexa.”

“Anya…”

“No Lexa, just hear me out okay? Nia and her coven are coming in a matter of days. Who knows what shit that old bat would stir. We don’t know what’s going to happen, Lex. You should at least say it now before everything turns to shit.”

“You know, that speech was really empowering. Before everything goes to shit? It’s like you expect it to.”

“Well, I remember someone telling me before, ‘everything goes to shit when you least expect it to.’”

“Who said that?”

“You, dumbass. But you might have been a little high on the side.” Lexa threw a crumpled piece of paper at Anya.

Lexa knew that she has fallen in love with the blue-eyed doctor. She just couldn’t get over the guilt of not telling her the whole truth all this time. There were many times before that she nearly said it: stolen moments at the hospital during breaks, cuddling on one of the on-call rooms when they both have the time to nap, coffee dates at Grounder’s because they couldn’t go out at night because of their shifts.

The brunette also dreaded Nia’s arrival. She couldn’t very well be distracted by something as mundane as love when they could be walking into a war. She was raised believing that love is weakness. That was ingrained deep in her soul. But these past few months, she found out that even on the darkest, deepest crevice of Lexa’s broken soul, light could still shine through. Clarke’s smile warms everything inside her that was previously cold and unfeeling. Costia was the last drop of freezing water which successfully froze Lexa’s heart. But Clarke was the first drop of elixir which brought her to back life.

The brunette did not know it at the time but the moment she took over her father’s position, her heart started to drown in ice-cold water and not even Costia could save her. But Clarke was different. She just didn’t crack the ice. She thawed it all slowly until it melted into warmth deep inside her. She just hopes that it would stay warm for the rest of her life. It was getting harder to put on the hard, stoic, uncaring mask everyday she falls a little bit more in love with the blonde.

The mask kept her safe all those times. No one dared to question her or so much as look at her. No one had that luxury but her most trusted advisors. That mask had slowly slipped away from her grasp, and that scared her the most. How would she protect her people if she didn’t have the heart for it? Because let’s face it, her heart no longer belonged to her and her people. Clarke had already claimed it as her own.

* * *

“Hey Clarke! You look hot!” Anya whistled. They just parked outside Clarke’s house and a couple of minutes later, Clarke walked out donning her tightest black skinny jeans, a white tank top underneath a black leather jacket and a pair of black pumps. She left her silky blonde hair flowing over her shoulders. “Lexa, dear, close your mouth.” Anya teased when Lexa froze, leaning against the passenger side of her car.

“Shut up Anya.” Lexa grumbled. She placed a quick kiss on Clarke’s lips and opened the door for the blonde.

“Anya, I’m glad you could come!” Clarke squealed excitedly as she shared an awkward hug with Anya who was in the backseat. Lexa started her car, backed off Clarke’s driveway then they were on their way.

“Eh, my schedule conveniently cleared up. You should be thankful Griffin.” Anya offered.

“You mean you cleared it up. I was sure you were on night shift tonight.” Lexa smirked.

“Lex, dear, you know I love you. But sometimes you’re such a goody-two-shoes, pain in the ass. You’re a buzzkill, you know that?” The psychiatrist just rolled her eyes.

“Hey Anya, that’s my girl you’re talking about. Although I agree with you, you shouldn’t say those things in her presence.” Anya snickered. The nurse turned to a smug-looking blonde and decided to divert all the teasing to Clarke. “Wait, your girl? Since when?” Anya asked.

“Uh.” Clarke immediately turned into a tomato. It was Lexa’s turn to snicker.

“Uh-huh, I thought so. I swear, you two are the slowest people I’ve ever known in my life. And that’s a lot.”

“Shut up Anya. Stop teasing.” Lexa chastised. Anya just rolled her eyes and stared out the window. Clarke and Lexa glanced at each other, each wearing a small smile.

Fifteen minutes later, they’ve arrived. But something was wrong. The moment Lexa stepped out of the car, she already felt a pair of eyes watching her or more specifically the blonde in front of her. She looked around briefly, sharp eyes darting from corner to corner, roof to roof but she did not spot anyone.

“Hey, Lexa you okay?” Clarke’s hand found her own and gently squeezed it.

“Yep, why don’t you go ahead and tell your friends we’re here. Anya and I will follow.” Clarke just smiled and went in. Lexa turned to the nurse beside her and found that Anya was doing the same thing she’d done after they stepped out of the car. “You feel it too?” The brunette asked in a low voice, much lower than the normal range as to prevent someone to hear them.

“Yup. And it’s not going away. We need to leave as fast as this night allows.” Lexa just nodded and proceeded to walk in the door. The bar wasn’t packed but it wasn’t slow either. The psychiatrist immediately recognized the _boy_ who was all over Clarke the previous time they were there before. She motioned for Anya to follow as she made her way towards the table. The moment she got to grabbing distance, Clarke wrapped a hand on one of Lexa’s and pulled her towards her.

“Guys, this is Lexa and her best friend Anya. Lexa, Anya, this is Raven, and that one with the dart is Octavia and this doofus right here is Bellamy.” They exchanged a few hello’s.

“So does this mean you’re officially Clexa?” Anya suddenly blurted out. Lexa’s face turned red in embarrassment and fury, if the glare Anya received was any proof. She was about to chastise the nurse when the rest of the table laughed.

“That’s a good one. I’d totally ship it.” Raven seconded. It was Clarke’s turn to glare at her best friend. “What? It’s a cute name! Anya seemed to think so too.” Raven raised her beer towards the nurse who tipped her head to Raven’s way.

“So, Lexa. How old are you?” Octavia started with a serious look on her face, obviously trying to be stern. Lexa smiled politely at her and replied.

“O, that’s not how you interrogate. Watch.” Bellamy complained as he stood up.

“Lexa, what are your intentions with Princess here?” Everyone at the table laughed, except of course, Lexa and Bellamy.

“That was awful Bell! You sound like Uncle Blake!”

“Oh come on Princess. I do not!” Bellamy exclaimed, throwing a hand around Clarke. Lexa immediately stiffened. Her hand held a little tighter on Clarke’s. Catching on, the blonde squeezed Clarke’s hand to get her attention. The brunette looked at the blonde’s face and saw that same affectionate smile she saw back when she first asked Clarke to dinner and she was lost. It was Clarke’s way of reassuring Lexa that she was the only one.

“Hey Lex, care to accompany me to the bar?” Anya pulled at Lexa’s other arm.

“Of course, excuse us please. Would you like something from the bar?” The others shook their heads. The brunette nodded and turned her attention towards the blonde who’s still nestled against Bell’s arm. She raised an eyebrow in form of question. The blonde mumbled ‘beer’ and Lexa and Anya went on their way.

**C**

“She’s gorgeous Clarke!” Octavia exclaimed. The blonde blushed. “And please Bell, stop touching Clarke. You’re making Lexa uncomfortable.” The older Blake blinked in confusion.

“Why would she be uncomfortable? This is how we are.”

“We know that Bell. But from the outside, it looks really… _suspicious_.” Raven muttered. She saw how Lexa tensed earlier.

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re making her jealous you dumbass!” Octavia hissed at her brother. She loved her brother dearly but sometimes, she wondered if Bell was just being an ass on purpose or he liked Clarke more than what he lets on. The older Blake just laughed.

“Clarke why aren’t you saying anything?” Raven demanded. The blonde doctor just stared at the three.

“What do you want me to say?” Clarke defended. She knew they looked ‘couple-y’, as Lexa put it, but she already discussed this with the brunette. The psychiatrist knew how she felt about Bell. Octavia and Raven just looked at each other and shook their heads. If Clarke kept this up, she’d lose Lexa faster than she expected.

“Hey, why the somber looks?” Anya spoke up from behind them. She had a beer in hand while Lexa had two. “Sorry we took too much time, the bar’s busy. So what did we miss?” Anya asked. The four just shook their head and smile.

“Here’s your beer.” Lexa handed the beer to Clarke who just took it with a thanks a smile. The whole night they talked about Clarke and her eventful childhood. Lexa stayed quiet the whole time, letting out a hum of agreement and a smile on appropriate times. Anya and Lexa was mindful of their surroundings, the feeling of being watched still not going away.

“Well, well. If it isn’t the mighty Lexa.” A voice from behind them spoke up. The psychiatrist immediately tensed. She’d know that scent anywhere. “Oh, and she’s got the sidekick as well, Anya. It’s lovely to see you.” The two in question immediately stood up. Their face turning into a mask of indifference in seconds. The others at the table curiously watched the scene play out.

“Roan.” Lexa’s voice was cold.

“Is that how you greet your cousins now? Come on, give me a hug.” Roan made a move towards Lexa. Anya was quick to get in between them and get a hold of the man’s hand.

“Don’t touch her.” Anya growled. Roan put both his hands up in mock-surrender.

“This one’s getting feistier Lexa. You should keep her in a leash.”

“What do you want Roan?”

“You know what I want Lexa.” Roan gritted out. He took another step forward and this time Lexa had been quick to stop Anya from doing anything. Lexa could smell alcohol and _other things_ on his breath now that they’re toe-to-toe.

“Your feud isn’t with me Roan. It’s with your mother. She’s the one who disowned you, remember?” The psychiatrist stated calmly. The other four people was now standing, ready to interfere if everything turns ugly. Raven was beside Clarke, who was still closely leaning to Bellamy. Octavia was at the edge holding a dart tightly on her hand.

“Yes she did, but it was all because of you. Everything is about you.” Roan stepped closer to Lexa’s personal space to whisper in her ear. “You remember Costia?...” Clarke and her friends stood there watching as Lexa’s jaw clenched, her hands balled into fists. She was clearly furious. Clarke could barely make out Costia’s name as she read the man’s, Roan’s, lips. She still didn’t know what happened to Lexa’s ex but now, she was pretty sure Roan had something to do with it. Roan’s eyes flicked towards her and he smiled predatorily at her. Clarke shivered. The man took a step back from Lexa, who was shaking in anger. “You know what’s going to happen Lexa. Why are you still hoping it’ll be different?” With that, Roan completely walked away and out the door.

“That fucker!” Anya exclaimed, slamming her beer bottle on the table and lunging towards the door.

“Anya, stop.” Lexa ordered coldly.

“What? After all he’d said? All he did?!” Anya asked incredulously. She was red on the face and looked like she might kill any minute now.

“Enough Anya, let him go.” Lexa sat back down. And sipped her beer as if nothing happened.

“But Lexa!”

“I said enough!” Lexa’s voice grew louder on the last word. A few of the other bar-goers turned to look at them. Anya flinched and bowed her head, sitting right back down. The others followed. A long, discomforting silence ensued. Until Raven broke it off.

“So, who was that guy?” The Latina quietly asked. She couldn’t take the choking silence anymore.

“That, was my dear cousin. He’s lovely isn’t he?” The psychiatrist stared straight into Raven’s eyes. Her voice was emotionless.

“He had something to do with Costia, didn’t he?” Clarke asked. Anya’s head snapped up to Clarke’s face, surprise clearly written on her face. Then she turned to Lexa who still wore her stoic mask. Anya’s expression softened.

“You told her about Costia?”

“Of course, I did. What else would you have me do?” Lexa snapped.

“Nothing, I was just… _surprised_.” The brunette shrugged. She turned her eyes from her beer to Clarke. Her blood boiled even hotter when she saw that Bellamy still had his arm around Clarke’s shoulder. The brunette understood that Clarke and the boy grew up together but she at least thought that he respected Lexa enough to keep his hands off the girl she was seeing. But no, the boy just kept clinging onto Clarke like a koala and the blonde still had yet to do something about it. It doesn’t help that Bellamy kept smiling smugly at her every time he sees her discomfort. Raven cleared her throat.

“Bell, could you get us some more beer? I’m about to finish mine.” The Latina asked.

“That one’s still half-full.”

“No, this one’s half-empty. Now go.” The boy rolled his eyes and moved to stand up. But before he did, he side-eyed Lexa, smirked at her and pressed a kiss to the blonde’s cheek, suspiciously close to the corner of the blonde’s mouth. Lexa’s heart broke when she saw Clarke close her eyes at the action.

**L**

“Whoa, hey, dude. A little respect. The woman who’s dating Clarke is sitting in front of you. Hands off.” Anya interfered, beer now on the table as she sat up and leant forward. She could feel Lexa’s anger throughout the night but she knows that the brunette will not do anything about it. By all means, Lexa does not let anybody step on her, but Anya saw how Clarke reacts to the boy and her Commander is powerless to stop whatever the boy is doing as the blonde doctor seems to allow it. The nurse noticed that Raven and the boy’s younger sister, Octavia, seems to be agreeing with her. Now what puzzled Anya was that Clarke seemed to be oblivious to the tension.

“I wasn’t doing anything.” The boy had the audacity to deny it, his eyes gleaming with arrogance as he looked from Anya to the brunette psychiatrist. The Commander has learned years ago to control her temper knowing that what comes after is pure chaos, bloodshed. And ever since, no one has ever gotten under her skin. But now, that control is slowly slipping away, making way to the raging monster that she truly is. If not for the dangerous game he’s playing with Lexa, the psychiatrist may even be impressed with the boy just for the fact that he got under her skin.

“Yes you were. In fact, you’ve been clinging to Clarke ever since we got here. It was tolerable, the small touches we could understand. But dude, that’s far too much.”

“What’s too much? This is how we are. If _she_ can’t handle that, she might just as well leave.”

“Bellamy!” “Bell!” Clarke, Raven and Octavia chastised. He may be their friend/brother but Lexa was someone that Clarke needed in her life. She didn’t deserve the insult of seeing Bellamy practically claim Clarke as his. 

“What? Isn’t it true? Clarke?” Bellamy smirked as his attention, so did all of the others’ attention, turned to Clarke.

“Stop it Bell. No one’s going to leave. And Lexa, please, just don’t mind him. He has always been like this, just ignore him.” The blonde doctor explained offhandedly.

“Clarke!” Octavia hissed. The younger Blake gestured at Lexa’s direction. The blonde’s attention immediately went to Lexa who was staring blankly at her.

“You know guys. I think that’s it for tonight.” Anya put a couple of bills on the table and stood up first. Her voice was void of any emotion, just as her face. Raven and Octavia nodded in understanding and stood up. Clarke and Lexa just stared at each other for a tense couple of minutes before the brunette turned away. The psychiatrist stood up, nodded at the three of them and led both her and Anya out the door without a word.

“You know; this is the first I ever felt ashamed of you being my brother.” Octavia muttered icily.

“What? What did I do?” Bellamy asked, faux-confused.

“We warned you. We told you to stop being touchy with Clarke. Lexa’s patient, she took all of your shit without any comments. But that kiss? That was too much Bell. You did that on purpose, I saw you smirking at her.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The older Blake defended weakly.

“Shut up Bell, you know very well what you did. And Clarke,” Octavia turned to Clarke, “my brother isn’t all to blame for what happened. He couldn’t have done it if you didn’t _let_ him.” As much as Clarke wanted to defend herself, what Octavia said was true. She wanted to know if Lexa would accept everything about her, even Bell. It didn’t occur to her that she might be pushing it. She glared at Bell for a good measure before walking out the door. She could hear Bellamy calling for her but the remaining two stopped him.

She screwed up really bad. And it broke her heart thinking how much she hurt Lexa.

* * *

**A**

The moment she stepped out of the car, Lexa sped towards her front door, not even caring who saw that she could run in a speed of light. Anya was hot on her heels who thankfully didn’t have to open the door because the psychiatrist didn’t bother closing it before she dashed into her study, slamming the door close in the process.

She thought about going after the brunette but decided against it, so instead she closed the door and stayed on the living room. She looked around and saw that more than two dozen people now stared at her in confusion, waiting for an explanation.

“What happened?” Indra asked.

“It’s nothing.” Anya shrugged. She wasn’t given the permission to divulge information. Lexa’s _seething_ right now. She didn’t want to add to the injury. Indra seemed to understand and just nodded. The nurse left the psychiatrist alone for the time being. She sat at the front porch, just staring at nothing when her phone beeped.

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:04am): Anya, I know you’re probably mad at me. I’m sorry, I was stupid. Can you please let Lexa know that I’m sorry? I just want to explain. She isn’t answering any of my messages and when I call, it goes straight to voice mail. Please Anya, I didn’t mean to hurt her.]

Anya’s nose flared. Oh yes, Anya was mad, furious even. Lexa was, _is_ her best friend. Through everything that happened, Anya was there for the psychiatrist. And she has never seen the brunette not be herself. The nurse thought that that was a good thing, hell, she _encouraged_ it. But somehow, she had been wrong. Still, Clarke was a breath of fresh air from Lexa’s dark and cruel world and the nurse thought that the psychiatrist deserved it. She still does. So for the sake of Lexa’s sanity, she replied.

[Anya (Friday – 1:10am): Why did you? I told you how much she’d been hurt too many times before. All because she decided to put her faith on someone else.]

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:11am): I don’t know why. I don’t know what happened. I thought she understood who Bellamy is to me. He and his family has been my rock all these years.]

[Anya (Friday – 1:12am): Oh trust me Clarke that was _very clear_ for her. If that’s what you’re going to say to her don’t even bother.]

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:12am): That wasn’t what I was going to say. I know Bell. He won’t change who he is just because he made Lexa uncomfortable. But if I asked him to, I know he would. But I know he’d pull away. I don’t want that.]

[Anya (Friday – 1:13am) What’s your point Clarke? My patience is wearing thin. Ever since you texted me, all I’ve read is how much you valued the boy and how little you valued Lexa.]

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:14am): Shit, I didn’t mean it to sound that way. I didn’t want to choose between them because I know who I‘d choose. And if Lexa left me, I’d be left with nothing. I love her Anya but I can’t give her my whole when I don’t have the guarantee that she’ll stay.]

Anya suddenly understood everything.

[Anya (Friday – 1:15am): You know she’ll stay Clarke. You _know_ her.]

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:16am): But that’s the point! I don’t know her! She doesn’t tell me anything. How could I be sure?]

[Anya (Friday – 1:17am): She told you about Costia, and she never talks about her _ever_. Not even with me who personally knew Costia. She isn’t exactly the talking type Clarke. She doesn’t speak her mind that much. But you know she’ll tell you everything you wanted to if you just _asked_. You didn’t have to hurt her to know if she cared about you. Jesus Clarke, you were practically cuddling in front of her and she just took it all in stride. But you went overboard with that kiss. And then just offhandedly dismissing it? What were you thinking?]

[Lexa’s Babe (Friday – 1:23am): I can’t lose her Anya, not now, not ever.]

[Anya (Friday – 1:25am): You should’ve thought of that before you let Bellamy molest you in front of your girlfriend.

…

…

Oh wait, she’s not your girlfriend. She could’ve been though. That sucks.]

[Lexa’s Babe Calling…]

Anya rolled her eyes but still answered. She knew that Lexa could possibly hear them but she didn’t care. Lexa needed to hear what Clarke had to say even if she didn’t want to anyway.

“What?”

_“I know I screwed up, can you please stop rubbing it on my face?”_

“’kay, is that all?”

_“Anya please.”_

“What?” The nurse growled.

_“You have to help me. I can’t lose her Anya. Please. I just got her. She can’t leave me. God, Anya, I_ love _her.”_ The nurse softened a bit when she heard Clarke crying. She completely understood Clarke’s doubt, she knew how secretive Lexa can be, but she didn’t have to break Lexa’s heart just to reassure herself. She could’ve just asked, like a normal person.

“Clarke, I believe you. But I can’t help you. She’s my best friend. You hurt her, I hurt you; that’s how it goes. If you really want her back, you have to do that on your own.” Anya could hear Clarke sniffling on the phone.

_“I know, I’m sorry Anya. I didn’t want any of this to happen.”_

“Oh, but it did Clarke. You can’t keep saying sorry to me. I’m not the one you hurt.” Somewhere inside the house, she heard Indra call out to her. “I have to go. Good luck.” She pressed End and went inside the house, closing the door behind her. She went straight to the study where everyone most likely gathered.

“Roan’s here. So ready yourselves, we might encounter some rogues.” Lexa started. “I want some of you guarding the girl for the time being. Roan made it clear that he wanted the girl.”

“Commander, if I may speak.” Gustus politely inquired. Lexa waved a hand for him to continue. “Isn’t she much safer in your care? She knows you and she listens to you.” Lexa gritted her teeth. Gustus had a point but she wasn’t sure if she could see Clarke now without breaking down. Alas, she had people to protect. She _had_ to do it.

“Okay. I’ll be keeping an eye on her too. But I still expect to see some of you shadowing her. I couldn’t possibly be with her at all times of the day.”

“Understood Commander.”

“If something goes wrong and the girl ends up in the hands of Nia, be prepared to go to war. Clarke is much useful to us alive than dead.”

“What if the girl ends up with _them_ , Commander?” One of the other 23 guardians spoke up.

“Do nothing. We can’t declare war on them unless they draw first. They’re humans. It’ll go against the laws we abide in.”

“But Commander, if she learns of what she really is, the girl is much more dangerous on _their_ hands!”

“My decision is final, guardian. Do. Nothing.” Lexa growled.

“Of course, Commander. As you wish.”

“Indra, Gustus, I want you to track down Roan and find out where he’s been hiding all this time. But do not engage. That’s all for now.” Everyone bowed their heads and went out of the room, with the exception of Anya.

“So, you want to talk about it?” The nurse asked.

“Talk about what?” She’s almost perfected that mask of indifference once again, but her eyes spoke of what she truly feels.

“You know what Lexa.”

“That has nothing to do with you.”

“Suck it up Lexa. Whether you want it or not, I’m here to help you.” Lexa’s pupils glowed. Her perfectly, aligned teeth grew a couple of sharp, pointy fangs. She bared her teeth at her best friend. A growl escaped from her, low and guttural.

“I’m the Commander. I don’t need any help. And you should learn your place.” The hair on Anya’s nape stood up in fear when she heard the fully morphed voice of the Commander: deep, cold and booming. The nurse took a calming breath, which didn’t help at all as she still kept shivering, and stared back at the glowing eyes of her best friend.

“I don’t care about who you are. You were my best friend first. Kill me if you want to but we both know that you need my help.” Anya’s voice shook. Lexa was already a force to be reckoned with when angry, but Commander, she is terrifying in a whole new other level. Anya watched as Lexa slowly, frighteningly walked towards her. After a deafening couple of minutes, Lexa’s face cleared as tears started to stream from her face. “Oh, Lex. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” The nurse immediately engulfed her best friend in a hug. She led them to the couch and let Lexa silently cry her eyes out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the shitty chapter. I'm a bit distracted by my work. I'll make it up to you, promise.


	7. The Storm: Part II

**CHAPTER VII.**

**C**

Clarke paced in front of Raven distractingly. She’s been trying to think of a way to win Lexa back but her mind won’t cooperate.

“For the nth time, Clarke, stop pacing! My head’s already hurting with all the movement.” Raven had her hand caressing her forehead to stop the pain.

“Raven! Why aren’t you helping me?”

“I am helping you, you idiot! I just want you to calm down! We won’t be able to think clearly if you go crazy over this. Jeez.”

“I _am_ going crazy, Raven. Do you know how much she means to me?”

“Then you should’ve done something about it! You keep saying that, but when it mattered the most, you didn’t even blink an eye!”

“I said I’m sorry!”

“I know! But my head is hurting and you’re forcing me to think of something to do for Lexa when my system’s overflowing with alcohol. So the least you could do is slow down.”

“Slow down? Raven, _please_. I need you to help me.” Clarke begged the Latina as she finally stopped pacing and sat down beside Raven on the couch.

“Let me be straight to you Clarke, okay? If I were Lexa, I wouldn’t want you to win me over.”

“What? Why?”

“The first thing you should’ve done the moment you got to the bar is actually _sit_ with your girlfriend not the boy who’s pining over you. The second thing you should’ve done was to pick up on clues that the said girlfriend was getting uncomfortable. Thirdly, you shouldn’t have let the boy pining over you be so intimate with you in front of your girlfriend. And last but not the least, the moment she walked out that door, you should’ve been hot on her heels. So, you see, you’re a pretty shitty girlfriend. Stupid too.”

“What are you talking about? The boy who’s pining over me? Bellamy is not pining over me.”

“Stupid _and_ blind then. Ever since you got back from college, Bellamy’s been all over you. All the lunch dates and dinners? All the cuddling in public? That’s not how friends act. Do you see me and Bellamy doing that?”

“But…”

“No buts Clarke. You should’ve at least _felt_ that. The same way you should’ve felt it when Lexa started loving you.”

“What?”

“Oh God, are you really that insensitive or you’re just dumb? How could you not see how she looks at you? The girl is in love with you!” Raven exasperatedly exclaimed. For someone so smart, for someone who studied how to assess situations, her best friend could be _so_ dumb. Then it hit her, “Oh. My. God. That’s it isn’t it?”

“What’s it?”

“You weren’t sure if she loved you back.” When Clarke didn’t respond, Raven already knew the answer. “God that was beneath you Clarke. You could’ve just asked her.”

“I-I didn’t know how.”

“So you made her jealous, so much so that it broke her heart?”

“No! That wasn’t my intention. I just thought that if she wasn’t okay with Bellamy, she’d confront me about it.”

“You’ve had this fight before Clarke. You remember that one time she got angry with you because instead of sleeping, you were out being cozy with us? You told her that there was nothing going on with you and Bellamy. So she probably just let it be for that reason. But the way you savored that kiss Bellamy gave you was far too much.”

“Yes, I remember that. That’s the other reason why I thought she’d be okay with it because she knows.”

“She knows who Bell is to you Clarke. By how she reacted with you and Bell, that’s _very_ clear. But the least you could do was respect her enough not to rub it in her face. And Bellamy wasn’t helping much either with how he was so smug every time she saw Lexa squirm at your closeness.”

“I’m going to kill him. But first, I have to get Lexa to talk to me first.”

“Clarke, you should probably let Lexa be for the time being.”

“What? Why? Is that your great plan? Let her think more negative thoughts about me?”

“Don’t be so dramatic Clarke. Her world doesn’t revolve around you. Just, give her some time to process everything.” Clarke didn’t say anything else. The blonde knew that her best friend was right. She’d probably just make it worse if she forced Lexa to talk to her. Clarke sighed dejectedly, just when she thought she’s got everything right, that’s when she’d screw up.

* * *

**L**

[17 messages from Clarke, 4 messages from Unknown Number]

Lexa immediately deleted Clarke’s messages and her voicemails. Her brows furrowed at the four messages from the unknown number. She doesn’t remember ever giving her number to anyone. So she read it.

[Unknown Number (Friday – 4:47am): Hi Dr. Woods. This is Raven Reyes, Clarke’s best friend. I got your number from Clarke’s phone. And I know that you probably don’t like me snooping either, but could you please just read my messages first before you delete it?]

[Unknown Number (Friday – 4:50am): I know you probably don’t want to talk to any of us but I just wanted you to know how sorry Clarke was for everything that happened last night. I know both of my friends made a huge mistake and I’m not condoning it in any way, but can you please let Clarke explain? Even for just a few minutes.]

[Unknown Number (Friday – 4:53am): If not for her sake, for yours. I may not know you, but I can see that you care dearly about my best friend and that she hurt you badly. But could you really move on from that without knowing why it happened? I’m not saying you should do it, that’s your decision. I just think you owe it to yourselves to clear this up first before it starts getting worse.]

[Unknown Number (Friday – 4:57am): Again, I’m sorry for what happened. If it makes you feel any better, Bellamy received an earful from both me and her little sister (probably a few bruises too). Just please, think about what I said. PS: I’m doing this for my sake too, Clarke’s driving me crazy. So I hope you change your mind. Thank you.]

Lexa let out a small smile. Raven’s much more like Anya. And she really liked the girl even if she only met her once. She made Anya laugh, _genuinely_ laugh. And that’s a huge thing. So she replied…

[Lexa (Friday – 9:31am): Good morning Raven. You’re a good friend. But what Clarke did to me was truly unacceptable. I know she and Bellamy are close, but a little consideration on their part would’ve been appreciated. The boy clearly has feelings for Clarke. I promise to think about letting Clarke explain, but I doubt that’d be today. I still don’t know how to face her.]

[Lexa (Friday – 9:34am): Thank you for apologizing though you don’t have to apologize to me, you did nothing wrong. You didn’t have to do anything to Bellamy but it does make me feel better knowing that. So thank you. And I’m sorry if Clarke’s driving you crazy but you are her best friend, she is meant to drive you crazy just as I’m meant to drive Anya crazy. Have a good day, Raven.]

[Raven (Friday – 9:37am): Good morning Dr. Woods. I fully understand what you’re saying and I thank you for replying. I hope you have a good day too, Dr. Woods.]

Lexa started her day feeling a little bit better. She rarely cried ever but letting it all out helped her immensely. Having Anya was a bonus too. The nurse tried her best to make her smile, even going to the lengths of singing Lexa’s favorite songs. Lexa couldn’t help but laugh at her friend’s antics because Anya can’t carry a tune if it’s meant to save her life. The songs were _butchered_ , and not in a good way.

The psychiatrist arrived at the hospital 30 minutes before her actual 11am-shift. Anya had to get there earlier to relieve the one who covered for her. Lexa knew that Roan was somewhere in the vicinity the moment she entered the hospital. Even with all the blood and antiseptics, she could smell his scent just fine. She looked at the two guardians who had taken the first shift on guarding the blonde. One was stationed at the waiting room near Trauma and the other near the ambulance dock. She had faith in all of her guardians, she trained them after all. She knew they could keep up with Roan, even with her cousin’s bloodline.

The brunette made it to the elevator and pushed her floor number. Just as the doors were about to close, Lexa caught a glimpse of blonde hair as a hand stopped the elevator from fully closing. Then Lexa’s senses were filled with _Clarke_. The trauma surgeon had her head down so she probably didn’t notice Lexa, making it easier for the brunette to take in Clarke’s appearance. Even on the side, Lexa could make out the blonde’s bloodshot eyes and the bags under them. Her hair looked like it hasn’t been combed before she got out of the house and her posture was slumped. To say that the blonde looked like shit was probably accurate and more. Lexa’s heart ached for Clarke. She had to keep herself from taking the blonde in her arms. The brunette was still furious with Clarke’s actions last night. And Lexa wasn’t exactly known for forgiving easily. The door opened to the blonde’s floor and Clarke shuffled off the elevator. Lexa just stared at the blonde before Clarke fully disappeared with the closing of the elevator doors.

* * *

 

“Hey Lexa.” Anya greeted as she entered Lexa’s office without knocking, as usual.

“Anya.” Lexa greeted back as she continued writing on a patient’s file.

“So, did anything happen after I left?” Anya prodded. The nurse loudly plopped at the couch.

“Uh, no. Nothing happened.” The brunette replied distractedly, then she remembered Raven’s messages. “Oh, well, Raven sent me messages.”

“The best friend?” Anya’s brows furrowed.

“Yup.” The nurse waited for the brunette to continue but Lexa didn’t seem to get the hint. Anya rolled her eyes.

“And? Come on, Lexa, don’t leave me hanging here.” The psychiatrist sighed and closed the file. It was clear that she wouldn’t be able to concentrate on it when Anya was there. She glared at the nurse before releasing a breath.

“She apologized for her friends’ behaviors. And she asked me to let Clarke explain.”

“The bitch had the audacity to _ask_ you?” Anya asked, feigning anger. She didn’t know how Lexa felt about it and she didn’t want to seem okay with it if the brunette reacted badly. In truth, she liked the Latina girl. She was honest, not in a painful, cold, Lexa way, but in a no-bullshit way.

“Please don’t call her bitch. She was just trying to fix what her friends did. She had nothing to do with it.”

“Oh. What did you say then?”

“I told her I’d think about it. What more is there to say? She was right anyway. I need to know why, if only for my peace of my mind.” Anya smiled inwardly. That was the Lexa she knew.

“So, have you decided yet?”

“Maybe. I saw her earlier you know, Clarke.”

“What happened?” Anya asked in concern. She saw how Lexa was the night before. The brunette couldn’t even say her name without breaking down.

“Nothing. We rode the elevator together. She didn’t even notice me because she had her head down. And Anya, she looked exhausted. It was painful.”

“You know what you need to do Lexa.” Anya softly said. The brunette just nodded. She took a breath and caught a whiff of a familiar scent. She’d been trying to not be distracted by the thought of Roan being in the hospital all day. It sent her mind into overdrive, not knowing where her cousin was or what he was doing. “Can you smell him?”

“God yes! I’ve been trying to get his scent out of my system all day. He arrived the same time Clarke arrived.”

“How did you know?”

“Oh please! Your girlfriend’s scent is intoxicating. No wonder they’re all after her. How can you even take being near her?”

“Practice."

"Huh?"

"Never mind. Don’t you have patients to attend to? Why are you here?”

“Oh, nothing. Just wanted to see if you were still a stuck-up bitch.” The brunette menacingly glared at her. Anya just smiled sweetly at her. She knew she crossed a line. Best friend or not, no one was allowed to talk to the Commander like that.

“Speak to me that way again and I’ll snap your neck.” The brunette threatened. Anya knew the brunette spoke the truth. She mumbled a soft apology and hightailed the hell out of there.

The rest of the evening was uneventful for Lexa. Her patients came and go, just like every day. She thought about everything that’s happened lately, from meeting Clarke, to news of Nia’s arrival, Roan and falling in love with Clarke. It was complicated as shit if you asked her.

Her musings were cut off by her office door slamming open. It was thirteen minutes past 2 in the morning, she was sure no one desperately needed her help. She looked up, a reprimand ready on her lips when she saw it was Clarke. She was crying and shaking, her phone on hand. Anya followed soon after hearing the noise from all the way down the cafeteria.

“Where’s your cousin?” Clarke angrily asked. Lexa was confused.

“What are you talking about? Clarke I…” The blonde lunged at her and took hold of her coat lapels. Anya was too shocked to react. The blonde didn’t seem to notice her superhuman speed and the fact that she was lifting Lexa a few inches of the floor by her _coat lapels_.

“Where the hell is he?!” Clarke’s scream shook Anya out of her shock and immediately got in between the two.

“What the hell Clarke? Calm down!” Anya held Clarke back, away from Lexa who stared blankly at the blonde. By now, the two guardians designated to Clarke had also arrived. It was Eli and Maia. They closed the door behind them to avoid people from seeing something they shouldn’t.

“Calm down?! Her cousin got my friends!” Clarke hysterically screamed. She tried getting out of Anya’s grip but the nurse was much stronger, even with the blonde’s newfound strength.

“What do you mean by he got them?” Anya asked. Clarke instantly deflated, all strength leaving her as she slumped against Anya. She was a crying mess. She handed the phone to the nurse and the nurse gasped. Anya handed Lexa the phone.

There was a picture of Raven, Octavia and Bellamy hanging on the ceiling by their hands, Roan on the side. They were clearly bloody and bruised. But they were also alive. The caption was: Call the police and their dead. Come to me and they live.

“Why is he doing this? I don’t even know him.” Clarke asked.

“Eli, Maia. Call Indra or Gustus. Ask them if they found Roan. Now!” The brunette ordered the two guardians. Anya led Clarke to the couch and sat her on it. Lexa retrieved a bottled water from her desk drawer and immediately handed it to Clarke. The blonde let out a small smile.

“I should’ve known that you kept bottled waters in your desk drawers.” The blonde tried to joke but the crack in her voice was too upsetting. “I’m sorry Lexa. I’m sorry.” The blonde apologized. The brunette immediately engulfed Clarke into a tight hug. The trauma surgeon clung to her as she sobbed on the brunette’s neck. Anya looked away and stood up. Just then the two guardians returned.

“Indra is out there now with Gustus. She says Roan has a dozen rogues with him and three hostages. They already sent the address. She’s asking if they should move in.” Eli reported, not caring that Clarke was there listening. They all knew that their secret would soon be uncovered by the blonde. But now, they had to save her friends.

“Tell them to stay put. Wait for us. Leave now and meet them there. Send Anya the address.” The two bowed and immediately left. “Clarke, hey. We’re going to save them. You need to stay here.” Clarke’s head shot up so fast, they heard a crack.

“No! I want to come with you. I want to know what’s going on. What the hell are rogues? And who the hell are those two?”

“Clarke. It’s safer for you here.”

“No! I’m going and you can’t make me stay!” The brunette just sighed and nodded. They quickly got to the car and started driving towards the address Indra sent them.

15 minutes into the drive, Clarke immediately recognized her surroundings. It was the same road that lead to her house. Anya was driving like a maniac, probably breaking every traffic rules known to man.

“Lexa, where are we going?” Clarke asked in a small voice.

“Shhh, it’s going to be okay.” Lexa knew where the road leads. She had been there once after all.

“Lexa, why is he there?”

“I don’t know Clarke, I don’t know.”

A few minutes later, they pulled over by the side of the woods near the house, not wanting to draw unnecessary attention to them. Anya had turned off the headlights by that time. Anya led them to where the four was hiding, the ruins of the Old Griffin house in front of them.

The four bowed their heads down in the presence of their Commander. Clarke’s confusion rose. The brunette motioned for them to rise.

“Is Roan still in the house?” The brunette asked.

“Yes Commander. The rogues are all armed with guns. My guess is silver bullets.” Indra replied.

“Gustus, take Eli. Take down their guards out back but do not proceed inside. As much as possible, take them out temporarily. Indra, Maia, you two stay here. It’s possible that Roan’s already expecting us. If he tries to run or any of them does, you know what to do. Anya, you’re with me. Let me take down the guards out front first. Do not let anyone near Clarke.” The brunette ordered. Everyone started moving away. Clarke’s eyes were wide. She was sure she was hallucinating because there is just no way could people move _that_ fast. And she was positively sure that no one could climb a tree without using branches.

“What the hell is going on?!” Clarke hissed quietly. The brunette turned to her mid-walk.

“I’ll explain everything later. For now, just trust me. Okay?” The blonde nodded. In a moment Lexa was there, the next she was gone. The next thing she heard was gunshots. She was immediately taken back to the night her parents died. Lexa said that her dreams were memories. But she never really had the time to think about it with her shifts at the hospital and seeing Lexa. She felt Anya lift her up bridal style, a second later they were standing outside the door of her old house. She felt dizzy all of a sudden.

“You okay?” Anya asked.

“You’ve got some explaining to do.” Clarke slurred. She felt like vomiting.

“Later. But first we have to save your friends from being bled dry.” Anya led the way upstairs toward the master bedroom like she owned the place. The moment she stepped inside the door, she saw her three friends hanging by the ceilings. Their clothes were bloodied and their faces were bruised.

“Commander. I didn’t expect to see you here tonight since the fiasco that was last night.” Roan smugly greeted. Just then, Clarke saw Lexa, also bloodied, but it didn’t seem like it was her blood. Her face was terrifyingly calm, add the small drops of blood adorning her face, you’ve got yourself a horror movie.

“Roan let them go.” The brunette commanded.

“And why would I do that? Because you told me to?” Roan started running the knife he was holding on Bellamy’s neck.

“So I’ll let you live.” Lexa clearly stated like it was the most obvious thing.

“ _Let_ me?!” Roan bellowed. The knife dropping to Bellamy’s arm to cut there. The boy let out a grunt of pain while Clarke shouted a ‘no’. Thank God for Anya, or she would’ve been on the floor by now.

“Don’t test me Roan. Now let them go.”

“Or what? You’ll kill me and show what kind of monster you are?” Roan spat out.

“You’re one of them. You bitch you’re one of them! I’m going to kill you!” Bellamy piped in as he glared at Lexa. Anya was quick to shut him up.

“Call her that again hunter, and I’ll kill you myself.”

“Enough Anya!” The three other women at the room just stared at the others with confusion, fury, shock and fear.

“Oooh, I didn’t know this little one’s a hunter.” Roan giggled manically.

“I’ll kill you too, you bastard. Just wait and see.” Roan backhanded Bellamy.

“You hunters think that you’re all honorable and virtuous. But where’s the honor in killing us just because you can’t explain what we are?!”

“You’re all abominations. You don’t deserve to live. Your mere existence is enough reason for us to burn all of you to the ground.” Bellamy gritted out as he spat on Roan’s face. Lexa could already see his cousin’s countenance change.

“Shut up Bellamy Blake or you’ll find yourself dead in seconds.” Lexa warned.

Roan’s eyes turned black and her fangs grew. Bellamy’s bravado immediately deflated, replaced with fear.

“Lexa, dear cousin. This is what you protect? These ungrateful humans, after everything we’ve done for them, this is how they treat us. You’re willing to protect these peasants?!” His voice was loud and booming, now fully-morphed.

“What are you people?” A barely conscious Raven asked.

“Lexa cousin, why don’t you tell our lovely guests what we are.” Lexa looked at Anya.

“We’re vampires.”

“You’ve got to be shitting me.” Raven laughed weakly.

“Oh no, dear sweet human, what she’s saying is true.”

“Enough with the games Roan, tell me what you want.” Lexa was losing her patience. This has gone too long.

“I want Clarke. You know my mother wants her. She’s my way back into the ranks of the coven.”

“You can’t have her.”

“Says who?” Clarke’s voice cut through their conversation, loud and clear. “I believe that’s my decision.” She was still held by Anya. The nurse was looking at Lexa.

“Clarke, no you can’t come with him. His mother will kill you the moment she sees you.”

“I’d rather have that than let my friends die!”

“I can’t give you to him, I’m sorry. I made a promise and I intend to fulfil it until the day that I die.”

“So you’d rather have my friends killed?”

“No. No one’s going to die tonight, or maybe one will.” Lexa smiled coldly. Everyone in the room felt fear creep up their spine, even Roan. She wasn’t called the Commander for no reason. “I gave you many chances Roan. And you failed to see just how lucky you are that I don’t just kill you.” Her voice was eerily calm but equally cold.

“You’re the reason I had to live like a rat for so many years.” Roan spat out, eyes still black and fangs bared. He forgot all about his three hostages and lunged for Clarke, knife poised to stab at her. Anya, who wasn’t expecting the move but still meeting him halfway, was thrown to the air like a ragdoll. Clarke closed her eyes waiting for the pain but none came. She saw Lexa in front of her, knife sticking out of her chest. The brunette had Roan off a few feet from the floor with a hand on his neck. The man kept thrashing but Lexa’s strength was much more superior. He had no way out of her grip.

“You had to live like a rat for so many years because of what you did to Costia.” Lexa’s voice was ice. She didn’t sound like _Lexa_. Roan had the audacity to laugh at that.

“Your whore?” Clarke could see the tightening of Lexa’s hand on Roan’s throat.

“She had nothing to do with all this. She was just a healer, a human.” Clarke knew that if she didn’t do anything soon, Roan’s trachea would be pulverized. Everyone watched the scene play out with bated breath.

“Lexa, don’t do it. You’d be just like him.” Clarke tried to reason with the brunette.

“Anya.” The brunette ignored Clarke instead she called for the nurse with her hand still holding Roan off the ground.

“Yes Commander?”

“Call Indra and the rest. We’re going to take them back to the house.”

“What?” Clarke asked.

“Yes Commander.” Anya was gone in a blink of an eye.

“What does that mean Lexa?” Clarke tried again. Roan answered for her.

“That means that you’d be kept prisoner by the almighty Commander until she decides what to do with you.”

“You can’t do that!” Clarke demanded.

“Of course they can Clarke. They’re monsters.” Bellamy once again, butted in. Just then the others reappeared by the door. Roan laughed.

“You’d sacrifice our kind for these people, Lexa? All they see when they look at us are monsters. They deserve to die.”

“That’s because we are.” Lexa raised her other hand and immediately snapped Roan’s neck.

“Y-you just killed your own cousin.” Clarke stammered.

“No, I didn’t. He would heal. Indra, Gustus, Maia, take them down. Eli take Roan.” Lexa gestured at the three hostages.

“You! I will kill you, you sons of bitches! You killed Jenner and Marco! You monsters!” Bellamy screamed as he kicked at Gustus who was trying to cut him down. Clarke’s eyes widened in recognition. Those were the two casualties of the hunting accident. That means, they were the ones who injured all those men, including Bellamy and his Dad.

“You were the ones responsible for the hunting accident?” Clarke asked in a small voice, afraid of the answer.

“We are.” Lexa answered simply as she pulled out the knife stuck at her chest like it was nothing.

“How could you be so calm knowing you’ve killed two people?!” Clarke bellowed. Lexa just stared at her. She walked towards the three hostages. Raven dropped unconscious the moment Indra let her down. Octavia just stared at all of them, probably from shock or anger, while Maia cut her rope down. Bellamy still tried to fight against Gustus.

“Make him go to sleep, that way it’d be much easier to carry them back to the house.” Gustus nodded. He hit something on Bellamy’s neck and the boy immediately sagged.

“What if we don’t want to?” Clarke asked, not looking at Lexa.

“I wasn’t giving you a choice Clarke.” Lexa stated and proceeded to get out of the room, followed by Indra, with Raven’s body on her shoulder, Gustus with Bellamy’s, Maia with Octavia’s and Eli with Roan’s. Clarke was left with Anya.

“Clarke…”

“No. I don’t want to hear anything coming out of your mouth.” Clarke bitterly spat out.

Anya just gritted her teeth. She wasn’t used to being talked to like that. Most people only shake in fear when they find out what they are. Apparently, there’s a first for everything. Anya quickly moved beside Clarke and hit that same spot on her neck, like Gustus did. Clarke lost her consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in one day. I know it doesn't make up for that last chapter but I hope you can bear with me. :)


	8. Battleground

**CHAPTER VIII**.

**C**

Clarke woke up with a head-bashing headache. It also didn’t help that her body seemed to be hurting all over too. She sat up and with her hands covering her eyes. _Where the hell is this light coming from?_ She thought. She felt around the bed when something moved. She turned her head to see what it was. Everything that happened earlier that morning came rushing back to her when she saw Raven’s bruised face sleeping next to her. She immediately got out of the bed, remembering where they were. She looked outside the window and saw nothing but trees.

She went back to the bed and gently shook Raven awake. The Latina woke up with a jolt, her eyes were wide and scared. Clarke immediately put a hand over Raven’s mouth and gestured for her to keep quiet. She pointed to the door and Raven nodded. They slowly tiptoed out the room in search for their friends. When they finally found the other two, they hurried down the stairs quietly. They looked around for the front door, but when they spotted that some of the vampires lounging around the living room, they took a different route towards the back door. Clarke breathed a sigh of relief when she saw no one near the kitchen.

They were already in the kitchen when a voice made them freeze.

“Sneaking out so early in the morning?” A smooth, silky voice murmured. Clarke would know that voice anywhere. They all turned their heads towards the voice. Lexa stood leaning against the fridge while Anya sat at the counter beside her, eating a sandwich.

“It’s not like they could Lexa. They should know by now that we could hear very well.” Anya muttered as she took another bite of her sandwich.

“Why are we here?” Clarke asked boldly. She glanced at the living room just to see that most of the vampires were watching them. Lexa just rolled her eyes.

“Indra, would you please get the rest out of the house? Our guests are getting distracted.” The brunette commanded loudly. Indra answered with a ‘yes Commander’ and in a minute, the 6 of them were left alone.

“You’re here because we saved your lives.” The brunette answered Clarke’s question offhandedly.

“If it weren’t for you monsters our lives wouldn’t even be in danger.” Bellamy spat out as she glared at the two vampires. Clarke could see Anya’s jaw clench at the word ‘monsters’ while Lexa just stayed stoic. When did the brunette get so good in hiding her emotions from _Clarke_?

“Wrong. You brought this on yourselves.” The brunette stated.

“What the hell are you on about?” Octavia bit out angrily.

“It seems that the little sister doesn’t know about the family business.” The nurse hopped off the counter and took quick steps towards them. Bellamy, in all his false bravado, stepped in front of her. “You’re digging yourself in a much deeper hole here boy. Get out of my way.” Anya gritted out as he took another step towards Bellamy, their noses now touching. The four held their breath.

“Enough Anya. Stop intimidating them.” Lexa sternly chastised. Anya took a step back from Bellamy and let out a grin.

“What? It’s fun.” The nurse turned murmured. The brunette just rolled her eyes and started walking towards her study.

“Follow me.” She ordered. The four just stared after her.

“If I were you, I’d follow her.” Anya gestured for them to follow the Commander. The four hesitantly did with Anya on their heels. The nurse closed the door behind her and plopped down the sofa.

“What do you remember?” Lexa asked as she regally leaned back on her swivel chair, legs crossed.

“You, being a monster.” Bellamy murmured. Anya was up a second later. Lexa just put up a hand to stop Anya from taking any actions.

“You see, while you’re here, you should probably stop referring to us as monsters. The others are not really fond of them.” Lexa stated calmly.

“But you are a monster. Why shouldn’t we call you as such?” Bellamy pushed. Raven, Octavia and Clarke was beating Bellamy in their heads. He just doesn’t know when to stop. They do not have any power at the moment to pick a fight against these creatures. They heard a growl from behind them. Anya’s eyes were already dark and her fangs bared.

“You keep that up Bellamy and I won’t be able to hold her back anymore.”

“You see you are - …”

“Bellamy shut up!” The three women all screamed at the boy. The nurse behind them laughed. Her face back to normal. They all glared at her.

“Now that that’s settled, answer the question.” Lexa’s face held no emotion, even her eyes. Clarke wondered if everything was just all a lie.

“Roan taking us hostage. The pain. You, with a knife sticking out your chest like it’s some sort of jewelry. And you snapping Roan’s neck like it’s a toy.” Octavia declared as she glared at Lexa.

“What else?”

“The talks about hunters, vampires, and some woman wanting Clarke.” Raven added.

“Ah yes. The woman’s name is Nia. I suppose Bellamy would know about the covens, yes?” Bellamy’s clenched jaw was answer enough. “She’s one of the covens’ leader.”

“Like you?” Raven asked. A part of her still feared them but the stubborn part of her wanted to know more. Anya let out a snort. Lexa glared at her best friend who raised both her hands in defense.

“In most words, yes.”

“What does that mean?”

“Why don’t we ask Bellamy here? Since apparently he already started his training.” Lexa gestured for Bellamy to speak. The boy glared at her.

“What is she talking about Bell? I’ve been hearing about this hunter thing a lot.” Octavia demanded.

“Nia’s a coven leader. But there’s one who serves as the leader of all the covens. She’s the leaders’ leader. She’s like the queen. No one has ever seen her face so no one knows who she is or what she looks like, they just called her Commander. And if what they’re saying is true, it’s her.”

“So they do educate you.”

“So we could kill the likes of you.” Bellamy bitterly spat out. “And now that I’ve seen your face, every hunter in the world will know who you are. You’ll be the main target of every clan.”

“That is if I let you out of my sight.”

“You can’t keep us here forever. Sooner or later, our Dad will find us and you’ll be dead.”

“What the hell is really going on here? How did you become a hunter Bell? Since when? Why does this Nia woman want me?” Clarke blurted out in confusion.

“Go on then Bellamy Blake of the Eight Clan. Explain.” Lexa ordered.

“Remember that boot camp I went to? It’s not just an ordinary boot camp. We were sent there to train, to learn as much as we can about _them_. Being a hunter isn’t a choice, we’re chosen. It runs in our blood, Dad and I, even Octavia. But Dad don’t want to risk her life when he knows there’s a war coming. A war because of you Clarke.”

“Because of me?”

“Yes. That’s all I know. The information about you is strictly prohibited for the highest ranks only.”

“Why are they after me Lexa?” The blonde suddenly turned to the brunette who just stared at her.

“I can’t tell you that.”

“After all the lies you’ve fed me, the least you could do is tell me what I want to know.”

“I never lied to you therefore I don’t owe you anything.”

“Yes you did. You knew who I was way before I even went to you. And you still chose not to tell me. You lied by omission. Last time I checked it was still a lie.”

“It’s not my job to tell you who I am or who you are. My job is to protect you and keep you away from harm. And would you have believed me if I had told you what I am?” Clarke’s silence was answer enough. “The hunters don’t stand a chance against Nia’s coven. Even Bellamy knows that. Nia’s coven doesn’t abide by our rules which makes them dangerous.”

“What makes you so sure that she’d even find me? _You_ lead Roan to me. Who says that Nia didn’t follow you to get to me?” Lexa couldn’t answer. Clarke had a point. If Lexa didn’t move here, the traitor wouldn’t have known about Clarke. But if she didn’t move here, the promise she made would be broken and the hunters would use Clarke against them. She can’t have that.

“I did lead her here.”

“W-what?”

“You bitch - …” Anya flew out of the couch and had Bellamy pinned on the wall by his neck in seconds.

“What did I tell you about talking about the Commander like that?”

“Anya, let him go.”

“Yes Anya, listen to your master. Question, if she orders you to shit gold, would you do it?” Bellamy baited. This time the growl didn’t come from the nurse, it came from the now standing Commander.

“I don’t have to torture you to make you suffer _boy_.” She gestured towards Octavia and Clarke. “You should remember that. Now, will you behave?” Bellamy’s jaw clenched in anger and nodded. The nurse let him go.

“I think that’s enough lesson for today. Anya, escort them back to their rooms and call back the others.” Anya nodded and proceeded to usher them out of the room.

“Wait, can I talk to you in private?” Clarke asked timidly. Lexa stared at her for a couple of seconds before nodding. They waited till Anya finished closing the door to the room.

“What is it Clarke?”

“Just tell me this. What we have, had, whatever, was it all a lie?” Lexa’s eyes softened.

“No. That was all real.” Clarke let out a sigh of relief.

“What was your plan when you first came here?”

“I was to keep an eye on you till your 28th birthday then take you back to the coven with me.”

“Why my 28th? What’s important about it?”

“I can’t tell you Clarke.”

“Then what the hell are we doing here if you can’t give me information?” Clarke snapped. Lexa’s eyes grew cold once again.

“As I said earlier, it’s not my job to tell you anything. I’m just here to protect you.”

“I don’t want your protection. I don’t _need_ it.”

“What would you have me do then?”

“Let us go back home. You can have your men watch me from there.”

“How about the hunter? Do you really think I would let them go knowing they know who I am and where we are?”

“I’ll handle Bellamy just please. Let us go. I don’t want to stay here.”

“Why?” Lexa’s voice cracked. She can’t keep the emotion at bay anymore.

“Because it just makes me hate you. And I don’t want to.”

Lexa just nodded. Clarke walked towards the door. Just as she was about to open it, Lexa spoke again.

“What we _had_ was real.” Clarke’s tears freely fell on her face as she exited the room.

* * *

 

**L**

“So, you’re really letting them go?” Anya asked as they watched the four blindfolded humans being carried out by some of the guardians.

“The boy has a point. The whole clan would be looking for them; we can’t have that.”

“He could still lead them here.”

“The boy cares for Clarke, he knows that what I said was right. His clan won’t be able to handle Nia’s coven alone.”

“But what about after?”

“Then we’ll worry about it after. Right now, let’s just focus on the current matters at hand.”

“Yes Commander.”

Lexa’s mind raced with thoughts of strategies, Clarke, hunters… _love_. She knows she shouldn’t be distracted in times like this, but her mind just won’t stop. Before the four were allowed to leave, Lexa tried to appeal against Bellamy’s side who _loves_ Clarke. He didn’t respond but Lexa liked to think that she succeeded.

All day, everyone readied themselves for the upcoming disaster that is Nia and her coven. Indra and Gustus were sent back and forth to the city to collect blood from blood banks. Lexa and her coven don’t usually drink human blood, but this case was an exception. Nia’s coven feeds on humans. They’d be in a great disadvantage if she didn’t even out the field.

The guardians took turns on guarding Clarke’s house. So far, hunters haven’t engaged them yet. Lexa took that as confirmation from Bellamy’s side.

It was close to midnight when Lexa’s phone vibrated.

[Clarke Griffin calling …]

She thought about not answering but immediately discarded it. She desperately needed to hear Clarke’s voice.

“Hey.”

_“I’m sorry.”_

“For what?”

_“For how I acted at the bar two nights ago.”_

“Clarke…”

_“No Lexa. You don’t understand. I want you. Only you.”_

“Clarke we don’t have to do this right now.”

_“But we do! Nia’s about to arrive and I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t want you thinking that otherwise. I know what happened was unacceptable and insensitive of me. And I’m sorry for that. I don’t know if I’ll be able to trust you again but what I feel about you remains the same.”_

“I’m sorry too. For breaking your trust. I care about you Clarke. So much.”

_“Goodnight Lexa.”_

“Goodnight Clarke.” Then the line went dead.

* * *

 

Lexa took over guarding Clarke the next day. She made sure not to be seen by her. The blonde made it clear that she didn’t want to see Lexa at the moment. She’d seen Octavia and Bellamy arrive a little after 9 am, probably to talk about everything that’s happened. She could’ve eavesdropped if she wanted to, just to know what they were saying but she didn’t. She did not want to betray Clarke’s trust again. She circled all over Clarke’s neighborhood, even around the surrounding woods for good measure. She’s got a dozen of her guardians roaming the woods looking for anything suspicious, but every time they came back, they had nothing to report. Even the hunters were quiet and that makes her think that they’re up to something. But she can’t focus on that, at least not right now.

It was quiet the whole Sunday but her guardians were getting anxious. Nia could show up any minute now. Add that to the high of consuming several bags of human blood, you’ve got a couple of dozen hyperactive vampires.

Nothing happened until after midnight. Lexa was still at her spot, hidden from prying eyes but still had a clear view of Clarke’s house. She watched as shadows began to move from the surrounding trees. She instructed her guardians not to get too close to the village so she knew these wasn’t them. She took a sniff of the air and immediately scented _human feeders_. They have this distinct scent of fresh blood.

She dashed towards Clarke’s house after texting Anya and the others to come to Clarke’s house immediately. She may be powerful but she wouldn’t be able to take on that many vampires _and_ still protect Clarke and her friends, not without causing a big and bloody scene. The four jolted awake when they heard the door close. They were huddled close to one another on a mattress in the living room. Bellamy had his crossbow in his hands in seconds, trained on Lexa.

The brunette signaled for them to be quiet and to slowly move towards her. Anya’s scent was a welcome one. _Good_ , Lexa thought. Raven was nearest to Lexa. She took a slow step but the faulty hardwood floor still creaked. That’s when all hell broke loose.

“Everyone here now!” Lexa bellowed as one of vampires flew from the kitchen door. She immediately intercepted it, took hold of its neck and snapped it. Another one followed, she did the same. Bellamy shot at the one who came crashing through the window. The vampire immediately turned to ash after being hit with a silver arrow straight to its heart.

“Commander!” Anya shouted as she and the others arrived, fending off the others from getting to the humans. Lexa, Anya, Gustus, Indra, Maia, Eli and Lincoln, one of the high ranking guardians, formed a circle around the humans. By then, they were surrounded by more than a dozen other vampires. They all had their teeth bared.

“Give us the girl.” One of them demanded.

“You dare order the Commander?” Indra roared.

“She’s no Commander. Protecting the humans,” the same one spat out in disgust, “when we could be reigning over them now. She’s weak.”

“I’ll get you for that one later _vampboy_.” Anya smirked. “But for now…” She turned to Lexa and the psychiatrist nodded. Indra got a hold of Raven, Gustus of Bellamy, Lincoln of Octavia and Anya of Clarke and they dashed through the path that Lexa provided for them and onto the woods where the rest of the guardians are waiting. The Commander was left snapping head after head like its child play. Then following the others after. She got a whiff of Nia’s scent. She was close.

“Everyone be ready. They’re here.” Lexa commanded as she took her position in front of her people, the humans safely tucked in the middle of the group. One by one, Nia’s coven members appeared in sight. Nia was the last one to arrive. There were easily a hundred of them.

“Lexa, aren’t you tired of protecting these humans? It feels like we’ve been through this a dozen times before.”

“Then you must know how this will end.” Lexa stated calmly.

“Oh no, we’re not here to kill them, we just need the one.” Nia’s eyes turned to Clarke.

“You know you can’t have her.”

“And who’s going to stop me? You and your weak, little army?” Nia and her coven laughed. “You don’t stand a chance against us. Unlike you, we know what humans are. _Food_.”

“How many times have you underestimated me Aunt Nia? You know I never come to battle unpre - …” Lexa stopped mid-sentence when she scented a _lot_ of humans around the area. She heard them before she saw them. There on the other side of Lexa’s group was a group of hunters, all armed with silver weapons. They had over 50 men. Lexa was furious.

“I thought we had an agreement Bellamy Blake of the Eighth Clan.” Lexa spoke low.

“You talked. I never said I agreed.” Bellamy smirked.

“You fool, you just led them to their deaths.” Indra hissed.

“You sold us to hunters?” Nia’s eyes were now black, her fangs protruded.

“She did no such thing.” Gustus replied.

“Well then, you won’t mind me killing them are you? Call the others, surround them all.” Nia ordered one of her minions. Suddenly, the 100 she got doubled.

“Lexa, what’s happening?” Clarke spoke quietly. She was pretty sure they were screwed. Lexa faced the four of them with a glare.

“Your boyfriend just sent those 50 men to their deaths.” Lexa turned her icy glare at the now, uncertain Blake. “I told you that Nia wasn’t to be trifled with. Now your people will be slaughtered.” She stated calmly.

“What happened to protecting the humans?” Clarke asked in desperation.

“We’re not here to protect them. We’re here to protect _you_.” Lexa replied in a voice void of any emotion.

“So that’s it? They’re all collateral damage?” The brunette didn’t reply. Their attention returned to a laughing Nia.

“Pathethic. Really. The girl really has no idea what’s happening does she?”

“I would if anyone just explained to me what the hell’s going on?!” The blonde exploded prompting another laugh from Nia.

“Do you know how special you are _Clarke_? You even had the elusive Queen go out of her castle for _you_. Your parents would be proud of her. I don’t know about _you_ though.”

“My parents, what do they have to do with this?”

“Enough Nia!” Lexa boomed. Her back was turned to Clarke to hide her gold eyes from the blonde. Her fangs were bared out in fury. Her voice has fully morphed like her true form. She wasn’t Lexa now, she’s the Commander.

“Well, well, the Commander’s finally ready to play. Kill every single one of them!” Nia ordered, her minions started dashing towards the group.

“Anya, Gustus, Indra, Lincoln, protect Clarke and her friends. Everyone else, protect the hunters! Don’t let any of them come close.” Lexa bellowed as she intercepted one vampire after another. Everyone moved without hesitation after hearing the Commander’s order.

**C**

Clarke couldn’t believe what’s happening before her. She could hear the screams of pain all over the place; a few snaps here, a gunshot there. She could see Lexa and her people going from one vampire after another. Though they were fast, she could see every move clearly. The four protecting them kept the others from lunging for Clarke but she can see they’re having trouble at the number of them.

She looked at her friends; their eyes were wide in shock. Bellamy had his crossbow positioned in his hands as he helped keep the vampires at bay. She tried to find Nia but failed. She turned around to look for Lexa instead when Anya suddenly went flying through the air. _Guess I found Nia_. She thought. Nia was about to take a hold of her when someone pulled her back. It was Roan. Clarke couldn’t believe her eyes.

“You traitor!” Nia screamed at her son when she got on her feet.

“This has gone long enough Mother. You can’t just kill innocent people.”

“What has happened to you? Have you gone weak like your idiot cousin over there?” Nia hissed.

“Maybe. But she had the chance to kill me and you, many times over. After what we’d done to Costia, we deserved to. But she didn’t. That tells me how strong she is.”

“Her human whore? She deserved what she got.” Nia once again lunged towards her son but Lexa got in between them, throwing Nia away once again. Clarke couldn’t see Lexa’s face but she could hear her growls loud and clear, she was _livid_. The brunette had blood all over her person. Her muscles rippled as she lifted another vampire and threw him as far as she could. Everyone around them were bloodied. She could see bodies lying everywhere: Nia’s minions. Clarke looked at the group of hunters being protected by Lexa’s guardians. They shot vampire after vampire, Nia’s minions turned to ash one by one. Nia seemed to notice this as she bared her teeth in anger.

“You can’t beat us Nia. Surrender now and I’ll let you live.” Lexa proposed in that same throaty growl. The Commander’s voice.

“Surrender? Never.” With that, Nia ran away, leaving her minions fighting for themselves. Their numbers slowly diminished: some ran away, some stopped fighting and surrendered. Anya made a move to follow Nia but Lexa put a hand up to stop her. The fighting still hasn’t stopped.

“Enough!” The Commander’s voice echoed throughout the trees. Every single one of the vampires froze. “Those who came from Nia’s coven, kneel down and surrender and I’ll guarantee you’ll live.” One by one, Nia’s minions kneeled down, even Roan. Clarke still hasn’t seen Lexa’s face but she could see her tense posture slowly start to relax. That is until a gunshot rang out.

Clarke’s eyes shot to Mr. Blake with a shotgun on his hand panting heavily then to one of Lexa’ guardians, Maia, as she went down. The guardian slowly turned to ash.

“Uncle Blake!” Clarke exclaimed. The vampires started growling at the death of their kind.

“We protect you and this is how you repay us?” The Commander’s voice was loud and clear.

“We didn’t ask you to. Just because you did doesn’t mean we will.” The deputy sheriff, Charles Pike, sneered. Suddenly every hunter had their weapons trained to a vampire, except Bellamy.

“Dad. Maybe…” Bellamy tried to reason with his Dad.

“They killed Jenner and Marco, Bellamy! That one almost killed us!” Bellamy’s Dad pointed his gun to Indra.

“We were just passing! You were the ones who started shooting us. We tried to get away but you roped one of us. We had to defend ourselves!” Indra shouted.

“Defend yourselves? You killed two of our people!” Charles Pike shot back.

“All we did was throw you off of us.” Gustus growled. “The injuries they suffered were from the traps _you_ installed.” Clarke tried to remember everything she could from the reports she’d read on that hunting incident. There injuries mostly came from wood spikes and blows to the head. The only odd thing she found was the hand mark.

“Either way, that was because of you.”

“Enough Indra, Gustus.” Lexa ordered then she turned to the hunters. “We came here in peace and we intend to leave that way.”

“Who said you could leave?” Charles Pike raised an eyebrow and pointed his gun towards the Commander. Everyone immediately moved in front of Lexa to protect her.

“I’m sure someone _will_ leave here. And we both know that someone won’t be you if you dare start a fight.”

“Yes, like how you left Abby and Jake Griffin that night.” Clarke’s eyes shot to Bellamy’s father. Raven, Bellamy and Octavia had their mouths open and their brows furrowed in confusion.

“What are you talking about Uncle Blake?” Clarke demanded.

“Shut up hunter!” The Commander bellowed.

“We’re not your minions Lexa! We do not obey you.” Clarke snapped.

“Yes Lexa, we’re not your minions. You didn’t tell her did you?” The oldest Blake asked. “Clarke, your little girlfriend here was there the night your parents died. In fact, she’s the reason they’re dead.”

“Lies!” Lexa screamed.

“Is that true? Were you there when my parents died?”

“Go ahead, _Commander_ , deny it.” Charles Pike taunted.

“Lexa! Look at me! Is that true?” Clarke’s breath caught in her throat. She didn’t need Lexa to say anything else, her blazing gold eyes was answer enough. “Oh my God. It is. You killed them!”

“Clarke, please let me explain.” Lexa’s face returned to normal in seconds as she tried to walk over to Clarke. Bellamy had his crossbow instantly trained at the Commander’s head at the move.

“Explain? Ever since I met you, you’ve been lying to me! That was why you wanted to know what I remember, isn’t it? So you would know if I remembered you.”

“No, t - …”

“You really are a monster. How could you do that to me?!” Clarke spat out angrily. Lexa’s jaw clenched.

“Clarke. You promised.” Anya warned.

“I don’t care about what I promised! That was before I knew who you really are! You lied to me! Both of you! You really are monsters. And I hate you.” She directed that last part towards Lexa with so much venom. The psychiatrist just stared blankly at her. Anya glared at Clarke.

“Clarke, Bellamy, get out of the way. So we could finish this.” Uncle Blake muttered.

“No! You will all let them go so they can stay the fuck away. We all know that you wouldn’t have survived that if they didn’t intervene. So for the sake of not owing them anything, let them go.”

“You have no say in this girl. So get out of the way.” Charles Pike hissed.

“No! I’m the only one standing in the way of you being slaughtered. You may be able to kill some of them but you know you can’t kill them all.” Clarke turned her attention to Lexa. The blonde glared at Lexa, “You’ll leave, now. And I’ll never see your fucking face again.”

“Clarke…” Lexa tried again.

“Shut up!” Clarke cut her off.

“Commander…” Gustus growled.

“Let her be Gustus.” Lexa, with her face in a neutral mask turned to hunters. She motioned for her guardians to let her through. The hunters immediately had all their weapons on Lexa, their fingers hovering over the trigger of their guns and bows. “You let us leave and we’ll never step foot in this town ever again. You start shooting, I’ll tear _all of you_ limb from limb with my bare hands.” The Commander was back to her true form in a matter of seconds. Almost all the hunters gulped, feeling the fear creep up their spines.

“Why should we believe you?” Bellamy’s Dad asked.

“You aren’t dead yet, are you?” The oldest Blake eyed the Commander for a couple of minutes before lowering his gun and motioning for the others to follow.

“Blake!” Pike hissed, not liking what’s happening.

“Enough Pike! Clarke is right. We survived because of them. Think of it this way; they just gave us another day to hunt their fucking asses down.”

“Wise decision.” Lexa commented. “Guardians, take the others back to the coven. Your duties are done here.” The said guardians bowed their heads without hesitation and went away. Anya, Indra and Gustus stayed. “Clarke Griffin, daughter of Abby Griffin and Jake Griffin, my oath to your parents is therefore completed and done for.” Lexa uttered and started walking away. Clarke didn’t know what to feel. Her confusion was furthered. _Her oath to my parents?_ Indra and Gustus gave all of them a hard glare before following behind their Commander. Anya stared at Clarke blankly, the only one remaining.

“Did it ever cross your mind how these people knew that Lexa was there? Or what else are they trying to hide?” Anya slowly enunciated. “Lexa would’ve told you everything about that night, had you just asked.”

“I asked her yesterday.” Clarke gritted out.

“No, you didn’t. You asked her what’s special about you. I have super hearing remember?”

“And she declined.”

“Yes, because knowing you, you’d probably try and get things done on your own.”

“She doesn’t know me.”

“Oh Princess, she knows a lot more about you than you or they could ever know.” Anya laughed coldly. Glaring at Clarke one last time, the nurse took off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delayed posting. :( Work is killing me. Hope you like this one.

**Author's Note:**

> Your feedback will be very much appreciated. Thank you!


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